Children should not be allowed to go to picnic parties, unless they have been invited and entertainment prepared for them.

Children should be taught to treat servants with all the politeness with which they treat their elders, and with much more consideration. The converse of the servants with children should be of the same careful and pleasant quality that the best parents use and desire. This may well be insisted upon. On the other hand, the children should be taught that servants are busy people, that they should never be imposed upon, and that unnecessary work should not be made for them.



CHAPTER XIV

ETIQUETTE OF MOURNING

UPON the occasion of a death in the family a reliable undertaker is at once notified and his suggestions followed as to the necessary preparations to be made for the funeral.

The shades are drawn throughout the front of the house, as a sign that the family is in retirement. The women of the family are not seen upon the street unless necessary, the men taking full charge of all business matters. The directions which the undertaker desires should be decided upon by the family, or nearest relative of the deceased, and then some one member of the family should be delegated to see that they are carried out. Palm leaves tied with ribbon or chiffon, spray bouquets of white flowers tied with ribbon, an ivy wreath broken with a bunch of purple everlasting, are much preferred to crape upon the door.

Press notices of the funeral and death should be sent to the newspapers. The conduct of the funeral should be arranged with the clergyman chosen to officiate, the superintendent of the cemetery consulted (usually through the undertaker), and the notes of request sent to those chosen to act as pallbearers. Sometimes the latter are purely honorary, the undertaker furnishing the bearers. The honor is usually given to intimate family friends, or close business associates in case of a business man.

A carriage is always provided for the clergyman, and he is entitled to a fee, although clergymen do not charge it, either at a home or church funeral. If the service is held at a church, the sexton, organist and singers,—and the singers at a home funeral as well,—are entitled to recompense for their services.

Carriages are sent for the pallbearers, and are also provided to convey the family, and as many of the friends as may be invited to go, to the cemetery.

One may announce in the newspaper "Burial private," in which case it is understood that only the family attend at the grave; or "No flowers" if the family wish the usual sending of flowers dispensed with.

The clergyman usually consults the wishes of the family as to the form of service, the hymns or music, and remarks. The funeral service should be brief, and preferably a ritual service with no sermon or eulogy. The last are usually harrowing to the feelings of the mourners, and there should be every reasonable effort made to relieve the tension of the occasion, for the sake of the living.

At a church funeral the pallbearers sit in the first pews at the left of the center aisle; the family in those to the right. At a home funeral it is customary to have the family in some secluded room near the one where the coffin is placed and to have the clergyman stand in the hall between, or at the entrance of the drawing-room, where he may be readily heard by all.

If the service at the grave immediately follows the funeral the house should meanwhile be aired, the shades lifted, the flowers all sent away to some hospital, and the rooms arranged in the usual way.

Before a funeral at the home, it is necessary for some member of the family to receive the relatives from the distance, and the very intimate friends, and see that they are given necessary refreshment, and their return to trains, if they must leave immediately after the funeral, thoroughly understood by the hackmen.

At a home funeral the singers should be somewhat distant from the family, so that the music is not loud.

The members of the family are dressed in hats and veils ready to enter the carriages, before the service. They pass to view the body,—if, according to a former custom, the casket is left open,—last of all, and enter the last carriage before that of the pallbearers, which immediately precedes the hearse.

In sending flowers to a funeral, one's card is enclosed. There should be no slightest sense of obligation in the sending of flowers, and each piece should represent only real sympathy or respect.

The putting on of black garments as a sign that one has lost a near relative has been much modified by the good sense of the people, and the period of mourning shortened, especially in England. In stating the accepted mourning custom, the moderate observance of it has been given, both extremes being ignored.

Crape is the quality of goods most closely allied with mourning. Black dresses trimmed with black crape are usually worn for the first few months by women who have lost a near relative. The black veil worn by widows is now of moderate length, and usually not of the very thick material which was once in vogue. A ruche of white is now placed just inside the bonnet, which relieves the black effect somewhat. Black furs and sealskins are worn with mourning.

The English fashion of six months of the deepest mourning and six months of secondary is meeting with more and more approval in this country, although for a close relative a year is the first period and six months the second.

One who is in mourning does not appear in society for the first six months; after that it is permissible to attend a concert or musical, but not the theater or a reception while severe mourning is worn.

During the mourning period, black-bordered stationery is used. The border on paper and envelopes is usually three-eighths of an inch for a close relative and half that for a more distant one, or during the secondary period of mourning, if one cares to make the change. The personal visiting card has a black border during this time.

The handkerchief is bordered with narrow black, or is of narrow-bordered, plain, sheer linen.

For relatives-in-law it is not customary to put on black, although for a father- or mother-in-law it is customary, in the best society, to dress nearly as for an own father or mother.

A widower wears a complete suit of black, white linen, dull-black silk neckties, dull-black leather shoes, black gloves, and a black ribbon of broader width upon his hat.

The mourning band sewed upon the coat sleeve is a discredited form of mourning. It does not denote the nearness of the loss, and has only the virtue of cheapness for those who cannot afford to show marked respect to the dead.

Men do not observe the custom of withdrawing from society for as long a time as do the women, but usually reappear at the homes of intimate friends, at public places of entertainment, and at the club after two or three months. As long as the mourning band is worn upon the hat, however, no man should attend large and fashionable functions, as dinner or dancing parties, or the theater.

After six months a woman may resume calling, returning the calls of those who called upon her in the early weeks of her bereavement.

Children of fifteen years of age and under should not wear mourning.

The viewing of the body of the deceased as it lies in the casket is the privilege of only the family and the immediate friends, and should not be requested by others. Therefore, the casket is now usually closed before the funeral service, especially if that be at a church. In case of a man in public office, it is sometimes necessary that the body should lie in state for certain hours, when the public may pay their respects.

Punctuality is very necessary in regard to everything connected with a funeral service, as the overwrought nerves of those who are sorrowing should not be taxed to bear any extra tension.

Within ten days after the funeral, a card of thanks for sympathy should be sent to all who have called upon the family or sent flowers or offered their services in any way.

When one is in mourning, one does not attend a wedding reception, though one may be present at the ceremony. Black should not be worn.

Mourners announce their return to society by sending out their cards to friends and acquaintances.



CHAPTER XV

MILITARY, NAVAL, AND FLAG ETIQUETTE

THE social usage in respect to military or naval officers follows ordinarily the customs of formal occasions or occasions of state in civilian life, or is provided for in the instructions of the army and the navy, which the members of those two departments of the service would alone be expected to know. There are, however, one or two occasions where the etiquette of social life is, or may be, modified by the formalities due to these representatives of the Government.

The Formal Military Wedding

The church or formal home wedding where the bridegroom and his attendants are all army men, may have the distinctive feature of the arch of swords or bayonets. The bridegroom and the ushers, in that case, are all in full dress uniform. The bride and bridesmaids are dressed daintily and fluffily to afford contrast. The church should be decorated with palms and lilies, and with the national and the regimental flags in the chancel. As the organist begins the wedding-march, two color-bearers of the regiment, carrying one the national flag and the other the regimental colors, precede the bridegroom and the best man from the vestry. The latter take their usual places, and the color-bearers move to a position at either side of the chancel steps. After the ceremony, they move to the head of the aisle, and the ushers form a line to the foot of the chancel steps. The ushers then put on their caps, unsheathe their swords, or raise their bayonets, and form an arch with them. Under this arch pass the bride and bridegroom, and the bridesmaids. Then, sheathing their swords and removing their caps, the ushers fall into line at the end of the procession.

Naval and Yachting Usage

When one is the guest of the owners or the officers of a yacht, or of the officers of a government warship or other large vessel, it is well to know that in the lading of the gig for reaching and leaving the ship, the order of precedence is always as follows: Juniors in rank or official importance enter the gig first, and the one highest in rank immediately precedes the Captain, who is always the last to embark and the first to disembark. In leaving the gig, the order is reversed from that on entering it, the junior in rank thus being the last to leave the boat.

The Etiquette of the Flag

The flag is displayed every day only on government buildings and schoolhouses. On state holidays, and like commemorative days when it is customary for the flag to be displayed on private buildings, it should be raised at sunrise and lowered at sunset. It should not be displayed on stormy days, nor left out over night. It should never be allowed to touch the ground. When it is to be displayed at half-mast only, it should be raised to the tip of the staff and then lowered halfway. It should never be festooned or draped, but always be hung flat.

On Memorial Day, May 30, the flag should be displayed at half-mast until twelve o'clock noon, and then raised to the top of the staff until sunset. The salute for the changing of the position of the flag at all army posts and stations having artillery, is as follows: immediately before noon, the band plays some appropriate air, and at the stroke of twelve the national salute of twenty-one guns is fired. After this the flag is hoisted to the peak of the staff, while everybody stands at attention, with hand raised to the forehead ready for the salute. When the colors reach the top, the salute is given, and the band plays patriotic airs.

The salute to the flag is used at its formal raising, and when it passes on parade or in review. The hand salute according to the regulations of the United States Army is as follows:

"Standing at attention, raise the right hand to the forehead over the right eye, palm downward, fingers extended and close together, arm at an angle of forty-five degrees. Move hand outward about a foot, with a quick motion then drop to the side. When the colors are passing on parade or in review, the spectator should, if walking, halt, if sitting, arise, and stand at attention and uncover."

In schools two forms of salute are taught. The first, for primary children, is: "We give our heads and our hearts to God and our country; one country, one land, one flag." The second, for all other pupils, is: "I pledge allegiance to my flag and to the Republic for which it stands: one nation indivisible, with liberty and justice for all."

When the flag is carried on parade, it is dipped in salute to the official who is reviewing the parade. Whenever the flag is displayed with other flags,—whether the colors of a regiment or other military organization, or of alien nations,—it should be placed, or carried, or crossed, at the right of the other flag or flags. When portrayed in illustrations by any process or for any purpose, it is so pictured that the staff will always be at the left and the fabric will float to the right.

The chief regulations governing the composition of the flag are as follows: In the field of the flag there should be thirteen horizontal stripes, alternating red and white, the first and the last stripes red. These stripes represent the thirteen original colonies. The colors red and white were chosen by George Washington, the red from the flag of England, the Mother Country, broken by the white, symbolizing liberty, to show the separation. The union of the flag—white stars on a field of blue—should be seven stripes high, and about seven-tenths of the height of the flag in length. "The stars should have five points, with one point directly upward."[A] The stars symbolize the States. "By an act of Congress on October 26, 1912, the flag now has forty-eight stars, arranged in six horizontal rows of eight each."

THE END

FOOTNOTE:

[A] Turkington, "My Country": Chapter XXIII, "Our Flag."



INDEX

Abbreviations, 99, 113, 115 Absent-mindedness, 125 Acceptances, 112 Accidents at table, 154 Accounts for children, 219, 220 Acknowledgment of wedding gifts, 211 Addresses on cards, 100; on envelopes, 60-66, 118; on invitations, 114, 118 Addressing: The President of the United States, 62, 63; Vice President, 63; Members of the Cabinet, 64; Ambassadors, 63, 64; Governors, 63; Mayors, 63; The King of England, 64; Dukes, 65; The Pope, 65; Bishops and Archbishops, 65, 66; strangers, 66, 67; married women, 67 Addressing wedding invitations, 118 After-dinner speeches, 166 Afternoon tea, 145 Afternoon teas for the engaged girl, 180 Allowances for children, 219, 220 Amusement, places of, 122-124, 170 Anger, 8 Anniversaries, 40 Announcement of engagement, 179-181; by newspaper notice, 179; by personal note, 74 Announcements: engagement, 74, 179-181; birth, 104, 105; death, 224, 225; marriage, 116; postponements, 119, 120 Answering Letters, 76 Apology, 29, 31 Appearance, personal, 6, 10 Applauding, 124 Art of Being a Guest, The, 137-144 "At Home" days, 145, 146 "At Home" invitations of bridal couple, 116, 117 Attitude toward strangers, 132, 133, 135

Balls, 112 "Bal Poudre" invitations, 112 Beauty, 10, 15 Begging pardon, 29, 82, 130 Behavior in church, 124, 125; public, 122-136 Best man, duties of, 8, 196-199, 201, 205, 208 Birth announcements, 104, 105 Birthday anniversaries, 41 Blank invitation, the, 109, 110 Bow, the, manner of, 78, 79; significance of, 80-82 Breakfasts, 148, 149; dress at, 12, 36; menu of, 148; wedding, 204-207 Bridal party: at rehearsal, 191; at "showers" and dinners, 181-183; at church, 192 Bridal procession, formation of, 196, 202, 203; at a church wedding, 197, 199; at a home wedding, 202 Bridal "Showers," 181-183 Bridal veil, 190 Bridegroom's duties at ceremony, 196-199; preparation of a home, 185; share of expense of wedding, 186; wedding outfit, 186, 187 Bridesmaid, duties of a, 8, 196-200 Business acquaintances, 129 Business cards, 100 Business, etiquette of, 83, 129 Business introductions by correspondence, 70 Business letters, 54, 55, 60 Business meetings, 123 Business training of a wife, 23 Business women, social life of, 171, 172

Cake: wedding, 206; bridal, 207 Calling upon one person, 93; a guest, 93 Calls: after entertainment, 90, 138; by men, 92; first, 94, 95; formal, 90; friendly, 90, 93; obligations of, 91, 138; upon brides, 94; clergymen, 94; government officials in Washington, 94; newcomers, 94; people of note, 94; return of, 90, 95; time of, 90 Candles, use of, 151 Card, The Personal, 96-105; form of, 96, 105; form of name on, 97, 98; inscription of, 97-100; titles on, 97, 100, 101; use of, 102-105; after change of residence, 103; announcing a birth, 104, 105; announcing a departure, 104; leaving, 90, 91, 103; of sympathy, 104; of congratulation, 104; presenting at calls, 91, 95, 102; when visiting or traveling, 103, 131 Cards, Place, 152 Carriages for wedding, 193, 196; for funeral, 226 Casual Meetings, 78-90 Chaperon, Duties of the, 169-173; necessity of, 169; in public, 169, 170; at calls, 170, 172; with the engaged couple, 173; for the debutante, 172; relations with one's, 172, 173; at a dancing party, 139, 147 Character, 7 Children, Etiquette for, 214-223; and mourning, 222; and servants, 214, 223; and visitors, 221, 222; at the dining table, 217; in church, 220 Church, attendance, 143; behavior in, 124, 125; of children, 220 Church weddings, public, 194, 213; private, 213; invitations, 114-119 Cleanliness, 14 Club dinners or receptions, 165, 166 Club invitations, 111 Club officers, 165 Conclusions of letters, 66, 70 Coffee, service of, 154 Condolence, letters of, 75, 76; acknowledgment, 76, 120 Congratulations, 76 Conformity to custom, 203 Congresses, guests at, 167 Consideration on the part of a guest, 141-143 Convalescence, 45 Conversation, 16, 48-52; at table, 35, 46 Correspondence, 52-55 Correspondence cards, 56 Country, entertainment in the, 161-164; parties, 144, 164 Country wedding, 117, 212, 213 Courses at formal dinner, 157, 158 Courtesy, 2, 3, 4, 5, 18, 19, 20; to servants, 45, 46, 47, 144; to nurse and doctor, 45; to invalids, 44 Cutlery, arrangement of, 152

Dancing Parties, 138, 139, 140; invitations, 109-111 Daylight, use of, 149 Deaf persons, 32 Debate, 50, 51 Debutante and the chaperon, 169, 172 Decorations for wedding, 192 Deference to elders, 214 Dessert, service of, 154, 158 Dinners, 149-158; announcement of, 155; choice of guests, 150; conversation at, 49, 150; formal, 137, 149; invitations to, 109, 150; lighting of, 151; menu of, 157, 158; place cards for, 152; retiring from, 156; seating guests at, 151, 155, 156; service of, 152, 153; table-setting for, 151, 152 Discipline, 46, 47 Dress, 11, 36, 112, 128, 134, 140, 186-190 Dress for men: afternoon, 13, 94; early breakfast, 13; formal breakfast, 13; evening, 14, 156; at weddings, 14, 186 Dress for women: at home, 16; ball, 13; church, 12, 189; dinner, 12, 13, 150, 155, 189; formal breakfast, 12; house party, 140; luncheon, 12; mourning, 13; traveling, 130, 141; visiting, 140; wedding, 187-189; as business woman, 15; as hostess, 13; as housewife, 16; as milliner, 15 Driving, 127, 128 Duties of Host and Hostess, 145-168

Emerson, iv Engaged couple, the: at a dancing party, 139; at home, 177; duties to friends, 178; in society, 177-179; meeting each other's friends, 178, 179 Engagement announcements, 179-181 Engagement, The Broken, 183-185; announcement of, 183, 184; explanation of, 184 Engagements: punctuality, 17, 32; punctiliousness in keeping, 17 English customs of entertainment, 158, 159 Engraved Invitation, The, 105-121; stock of, 105, 106; type of, 106, 107, 108; size of, 105, 106 Entering a room, 27 Entertainment, assisting in, 123, 124; English customs of, 159; for guests, 142, 162; in the country, 163 Entertainment committees, duties of, 166 Envelopes, 118; addressing, 59, 60, 61, 114, 118; sealing, 59; stamping, 59 Ethics, 1 Etiquette, an art, 2; the end of, iii; the need of, iii, 2; The Rewards of, 1-5 Etiquette of Mourning, 224-230 Etiquette of the Marriage Engagement, The, 174-193

Family Etiquette, 20-47 Faults among women, 18 Fees, 144 Festivities, rural, 164 Finger bowls, 37 First Calls, 94, 95 Five o'clock tea, 145 Forms of wedding invitations, 114, 115; announcements, 115, 116; reception cards, 116, 117; bridal "At Home" cards, 116, 117; personal cards, 96-105; dinner invitations, 109; reception, 117; "At Home," 116, 117, 120; party, 109; New Year, 121 Forms of announcements of postponement, 119, 120; gratitude for sympathy, 120 Friends, 21, 42-44

General Rules of Conduct, 26-33 Gifts, 40, 41, 42; engagement, 181, 185; for "showers," 181-183; of bridegroom to bride, 186; of bridegroom to ushers and bridesmaids, 186; to servants, 144; wedding, 210-213 Giving away the bride, 198 Gloves, 149, 151 Golden Rule, 2 Good-night formalities, 28; at a reception, 138; dancing party, 140; dinner, 156 Graduations, 167, 168 Greeting guests at a luncheon, 149; dinner, 156; reception, 147 Greetings, 28, 78-83 Guest chamber, 160, 161 Guest, the art of being a, 137-144, 167 Guest: at afternoon tea, 137, 138; a congress, etc., 166, 167; country house, 159; dancing party, 138; reception, 138; wedding, 195, 196, 201 Guests, tardiness of, 155

Handshaking, 80, 82, 86, 87 Handwriting, 58 Haughtiness, 11 Home, founding the, 20-26 Home wedding, the, 201-203; invitations, 115 Horseback riding, 128, 129 Hospitality, 145, 165-168 Hotel etiquette, 126, 127, 133-136; dining-room civility, 135-136; dress in, 134 House parties, 158, 159; sports at, 163 Household management, 22 Host, duties of, 137, 166-168 Hostess, duties of, 127, 137

Illness, 44, 45 Impartiality, 30 Informality in entertaining, 164 Ink, 58 Inscriptions on cards, 97-100 Interruptions, 17, 49 Introduction, letters of, 70-72; advisability of, for business, 70; socially, 70, 71; presentation of, 72; obligations of, 72 Introductions, 84-89, 148; at chance meetings, 87; at a dancing party, 87, 89, 138, 139; at a dinner, 89, 149; by a guest, 86; by a hostess, 86, 90; discrimination in, 85; form of, 84; of a gentleman to a lady, 84, 86, 88; responses to, 84; responsibility for, 88; to one's relatives, 88 Invitations (See "Engraved Invitation, The"); for dinner and dance, 111; entertainment at club, 111; formal, 105-121; informal, 74, 112; of widower, 111, 113; bachelor, 111, 113; widower with daughters, 111; to call, 93; to "Bal Poudre," 112; dancing or other parties, 109; dinners, 109; luncheons, 108; receptions, 117, 120, 121; "showers," 182; visits, 158; weddings, 114-117; to meet a guest, 120, 146; to meet a son, 113; to mourners, 114 Invitations, written, 110, 112; acceptances of, 112; replies to, 113

Jewelry, 12

Kant, 2

Letter writing, 52; discretion in, 52, 53 Letters: Conclusion of, 66; of classic literature, 53; of condolence, 75, 76; of Introduction, 70-72; of recommendation, 73; opening those of others, 24; opening, in company, 29; Salutation of, 66-68; Signature of, 66-69; to servants, 74; to strangers, 74; giving orders, 74 Letter-heads, 56, 57 Lifting the hat, 78, 81, 82, 83 Linen, for dinner, 151; trousseau, 189, 190 Luncheon, 148, 149; menu of, 148; dress at, 12

Maid of honor, duties of, 197, 199 Management of household, 22 Mannerisms, 17 Manners, 7 Marriage, 20, 21; ceremony, 197, 198; certificate, 191; customs, 203; license, 190; obligations of, 20-26 Men's cards, 96; club name on, 100; form of, 96; inscription on, 97; omission of address, 100; titles on, 97, 100, 101 Monograms, 56 Monopoly of conversation, 49; in friendship, 43, 44 Morals, 7 Mourning, dress of, 227-229; Etiquette of, 224-230; periods of, 227; stationery of, 228 Music at a wedding, 197, 200, 202

Neatness, 14, 46, 129 Neglect of family, 22, 25 Nichols, Dr. T. L., 9, title-page Non-acknowledgment of courtesies, 18 Notes, apologetic 55; congratulatory, 76; requesting a favor, 55; social, 57, 58; sympathetic, 75, 76

Obligations of letters of introduction, 72 Old English type, 106-108 Openings, formal business, 165 Out-door weddings, 212

Paper for correspondence, 55 Parents: consideration for, 217; consulting, 174; duties of, 169, 170; negligence of, 173 Party invitations, 109, 110, 112 Penmanship of invitations, 110 Personal Card, The, 96-105 Personality, 6-19 Picnics, 163, 161 Place cards, 151, 152 Plates, service of, 153 Position, 10; at table, 33 Posture, 10, 28 "P. p. c." cards, 99 Presentation of letters of introduction, 72 Presents: birthday, 41; graduation, 42; to the ill, 45; wedding, 40, 210-212 Press notices, of engagements, 179; funerals, 224, 225 Privacy, 24 Professional cards, 100 Proposal of marriage, 174-179; by letter, 175; decision of, 175; spontaneity of, 176; warding off, 175 Public Behavior in, 122-136 Public functions, 165-168 Punctuality, 17, 32, 142, 149, 154; at church, 125; at funerals, 229; for children, 217, 218

Receiving, at an afternoon tea, 147; dancing party, 147; debutante party, 147 Reception, guest at, 137, 138 Receptions, 137, 147; business openings, 165; college or school, 167; club, 165 Recommendation, letters of, 73 Rehearsal for wedding, 191 Rejection of proposals, 175 Removing hats in public places, 18, 122 Replies to business letters, 76; friendly letters, 76; letters of introduction, 72; notes of invitation, 76 Reply requests, 73 Reverence, 125 Riding dress, 128 "R. s. v. p.," 113 Rural festivities, 164

Sacrifices, 42, 45 Salutations, 28; of letters, 66-68 Savings banks for children, 220 School behavior, 218, 219 Script type, 106-108 Sealing Envelopes, 59 Seating guests at table, 151, 165, 156 Self-consciousness, 10 Self-control, 8, 31, 215 Send-off of bridal couple, 207 Servants, 73, 144; and children, 223; in the country, 161 Service of a dinner, 152-158 Shaded Roman type, 106-108 "Showers," Bridal, 181-183 Signatures, 66-70 Simplicity in the country, 161-164 Sincerity, 7, 9 Social introductions by correspondence, 70-72 Social calls of men, 92-94 Social life of the married, 24 Speech, 7, 16 Speeches, after-dinner, 166; at wedding breakfast, 206 Stamping Envelopes, 59 Stationery for mourning, 57, 228 Stock of invitations, 105, 106 Strangers, addressing, 66, 67; attitude toward, 122, 124, 130-132, 135 Street etiquette, 129, 132, 133 Sympathy cards, 120

Table etiquette, 33-40; for children, 217 Third-person letters, 74 Time of wedding, 194 Tips, 144 Titles on cards, 97, 100, 101 Training of servants, 46 Traveling, 130, 131; dress, 130; expense, 131 Trousseau, 187-190 Type of invitations, 100-108

Unselfishness, 9 Use of cards, 102-106 Ushers, at wedding, duties of, 195-198, 201

Visits, 158-165; being entertained, 142, 162, 164; dress, 140; entertainment, 158, 159, 163, 164; length, 158; prolonging, 142

Wardrobe of bride, 187-189; of bridegroom, 186 Wedding, anniversaries, 40, 41; breakfast, 204-206; cake, 206, 207; fee, 208-210; invitations, 114-119; journey, 208; preparation for, 185-193; presents, 210-212; reception, 205, 207; ring, 191; suit for bridegroom, 186, 187; wardrobe of bride, 187-189 Whispering, 29, 123 Withdrawal from society during mourning, 224, 227, 228 Writing on cards, 99

* * * * *

Transcriber's Notes:

Obvious punctuation errors repaired.

This text uses both out-door and outdoor. This was retained.

Page viii, "Person" changed to "person" (Third-person Correspondence)

Page 57, "Letter" changed to "letter" (Dead-Letter Office)

THE END