MONARCH LIGHTNING SAWING MACHINE

will save your paying money and board to ONE hired man and perhaps TWO men.

The boy at the right in the picture is sawing up cordwood in a buck frame. You can very easily use our machine in this way if you have cordwood on hand that you wish to saw up into suitable lengths for firewood.

A boy sixteen years old can work the machine all day and not get any more tired than he would raking hay. The machine runs VERY EASILY, so easily, in fact, that after giving the crank half a dozen turns, the operator may let go and the machine will run itself for THREE OR FOUR REVOLUTIONS. Farmers owning standing timber cannot fail to see the many advantages of this great LABOR-SAVING AND MONEY-SAVING MACHINE. If you prefer, you can easily go directly into the woods and easily saw the logs into 20-inch lengths for your family use, or you can saw them into 4-foot lengths, to be split into cordwood, when it can be readily hauled off to the village market. Many farmers are making a good deal of money with this Machine in employing the dull months of the year in selling cordwood.

It makes a great difference in LABOR AND MONEY both in using our machine, because you get away with a second man. It takes two men to run the old-fashioned cross-cut saw, and it makes two backs ache every day they use it. Not so with our saw.

We offer $1,000 for a sawing machine that is EASIER OPERATED and FASTER RUNNING than ours. Every farmer should own our machine. It will pay for itself in one season. Easily operated by a sixteen-year-old boy.

Lumbermen and farmers should GET THE BEST—GET THE CHEAPEST—GET THE MONARCH LIGHTNING SAWING MACHINE.

E. DUTTER, Hicksville, O., writes:—It runs so easy that it is JUST FUN to saw wood.

C. A. COLE, Mexico, N. Y., writes:—With this machine I sawed off an elm log, twenty-one inches in diameter, in one minute, forty-three seconds.

Z. G. HEGE, Winston, N. C., writes:—I have shown your machine to several farmers, and all pronounce it a PERFECT SUCCESS.

WM. DILLENBACK, Dayton, Tex., writes:—I am WELL PLEASED with the MONARCH LIGHTNING SAWING MACHINE. My boys can saw WITH ALL EASE.

L. W. YOST, Seneca, Kan., writes:—I will bet $50 that I can saw as much with this machine as any two men can with the old-fashioned cross-cut saw.

T. K. BUCK, Mt. Vernon, Ill., writes:—I have given the Monarch a fair trial, and can truly say it is ALL YOU CLAIM FOR IT, a complete success, enabling a boy to do the work of two strong men, and indeed, more. I would not take $75 for the MONARCH and be deprived of the privilege of having another like it. I sawed off a twenty-inch solid water oak log twelve times yesterday in FORTY-FIVE MINUTES.

J. M. CRAWFORD. Columbia, S. C., writes:—I tried the Monarch on an oak log to-day before twenty farmers. All said it WORKED PERFECTLY.

N. B.—We are selling SIX TIMES as many Machines as any other firm, simply because our Machine gives perfect satisfaction. Our factory is running day and night to fill orders. Send in your order at once. The BEST is the CHEAPEST. Our agent sold four machines in one day. Another sold twenty-eight in his township. Another agent cleared $100 in one week. BE SURE AND MENTION THIS PAPER.

WE WISH A LIVE, WIDE-AWAKE AGENT IN EVERY COUNTY IN THE UNITED STATES AND CANADA. Write for Latest Illustrated Catalogue giving Special Terms and scores of Testimonials.

MONARCH MANUFACTURING CO.

163 E. RANDOLPH STREET, CHICAGO, ILL.

* * * * *

REMEMBER that $2.00 pays for THE PRAIRIE FARMER from this date to January 1, 1885; For $2.00 you get it for one year and a copy of THE PRAIRIE FARMER COUNTY MAP OF THE UNITED STATES, FREE! This is the most liberal offer ever made by any first-class weekly agricultural paper in this country.



SCIENTIFIC.

SOME GOSSIP ABOUT DARWIN.

The last number of the American Naturalist presents the following from David S. Jorden, of Bloomington, Indiana. It is one of those gossipy bits about the great scientist that every body enjoys reading.

In a recent visit to England, the writer strolled into the village of Down in Kent, and talked with some of the villagers in regard to Mr. Darwin, whose beautiful home is just outside the little town.

Some of this talk, although in itself idle and valueless, may have an interest to readers, as showing how a great man looks to his smaller neighbors.

The landlord of the "George Inn" said that "all the people wished to have Mr. Darwin buried in Down, but the government would not let them. It would have helped the place so much. It would have brought hosts of people down to see his grave. Especially it would have helped the hotel business which is pretty dull in winter time.

"Mr. Darwin was a very fine-looking man. He had a high forehead and wore a long beard. Still, if you had met him on the street, perhaps, you would not have taken much notice of him unless you knew that he was a clever man."

"Sir John Lubbock (Darwin's friend and near neighbor) is a very clever man, too, but not so clever nor so remarkable-looking as Mr. Darwin. He is very fond of hants (ants), and plants, and things."

At Keston, three miles from Down, the landlady of the Grayhound had never heard of Mr. Darwin until after his death. There was then considerable talk about his being buried in Westminster, but nothing was said of him before.

Several persons had considerable to say of Mr. Darwin's extensive and judicious charity to the poor. To Mr. Parslow, for many years his personal servant, Mr. Darwin gave a life pension of L50, and the rent of the handsome "Home Cottage" in Down. During the time of a water famine in that region, he used to ride about on horseback to see who needed water, and had it brought to them at his own expense from the stream at St. Mary's Cray.

"He was," said Mr. Parslow, "a very social, nice sort of a gentleman, very joking and jolly indeed; a good husband and a good father and a most excellent master. Even his footmen used to stay with him as long as five years. They would rather stay with him than take a higher salary somewhere else. The cook came there while young and stayed there till his death, nearly thirty years later.

"Mrs Darwin is a pleasant lady, a year older than her husband. Their boys are all jolly, nice young fellows. All have turned out so well, not one of them rackety, you know. Seven children out of the ten are now living.

"George Darwin is now a professor in Oxford. He was a barrister at first; had his wig and gown and all, but had to give it up on account of bad health. He would have made a hornament to the profession.

"Francis Darwin is a doctor, and used to work with his father in the greenhouse. He is soon to marry a lady who lectures on Botany in Oxford.

"For the first twenty years after Mr. Darwin's return from South America, his health was very bad—much more than later. He had a stomach disease which resulted from sea-sickness while on the voyage around the world. Mr. Parslow learned the watercure treatment and treated Mr. Darwin in that system, for a long time, giving much relief.

"Mr. Darwin used to do his own writing but had copyists to get his work ready for the printer. He was always an early man. He used to get up at half past six. He used to bathe and then go out for a walk all around the place. Then Parslow used to get breakfast for him before the rest of the family came down. He used to eat rapidly, then went to his study and wrote till after the rest had breakfast. Then Mrs. Darwin came in and he used to lie half an hour on the sofa, while she or someone else read to him. Then he wrote till noon, then went out for an hour to walk. He used to walk all around the place. Later in life, he had a cab, and used to ride on horseback. Then after lunch at one, he used to write awhile. Afterwards he and Mrs. Darwin used to go to the bedroom, where he lay on a sofa and often smoked a cigarette while she read to him. After this he used to walk till dinner-time at five. Before the family grew up, they used to dine early, at half-past one, and had a meat-tea at half-past six.

"Sometimes there were eighteen or twenty young Darwins of different families in the house. Four-in-hand coaches of young Darwins used sometimes to come down from London. Mr. Darwin liked children. They didn't disturb him in the least. There were sometimes twenty or thirty pairs of little shoes to be cleaned of a morning, but there were always plenty of servants to do this.

"The gardener used to bring plants into his room often of a morning, and he used to tie bits of cotton on them, and try to make them do things. He used to try all sorts of seeds. He would sow them in pots in his study.

"There were a quantity of people in Westminster Abbey when he was buried. Mr. Parslow and the cook were among the chief mourners and sat in the Jerusalem chamber. The whole church was as full of people as they could stand. There was great disappointment in Down that he was not buried there. He loved the place, and we think that he would rather have rested there had he been consulted."

* * * * *

MISCELLANEOUS.

To Our Readers.

THE PRAIRIE FARMER is the OLDEST, MOST RELIABLE, and the LEADING AGRICULTURAL JOURNAL OF THE GREAT NORTHWEST, devoted exclusively to the interests of the Farmer, Gardener, Florist, Stock Breeder, Dairyman, Etc., and every species of industry connected with that great portion of the People of the World, the PRODUCERS. Now in the Forty-Second Year of its existence, and never, during more than two score years, having missed the regular visit to its patrons, it will continue to maintain supremacy as A STANDARD AUTHORITY ON MATTERS PERTAINING TO AGRICULTURE AND KINDRED PRODUCTIVE INDUSTRIES, and as a FRESH AND READABLE FAMILY AND FIRESIDE JOURNAL. It will from time to time add new features of interest, securing for each department the ablest writers of practical experience.

THE PRAIRIE FARMER will discuss, without fear or favor, all topics of interest properly belonging to a Farm and Fireside Paper, treat of the most approved practices in AGRICULTURE, HORTICULTURE, BREEDING, ETC.; the varied Machinery, Implements, and improvements in same, for use both in Field and House; and, in fact, everything of interest to the Agricultural community, whether in FIELD, MARKET, OR HOME CIRCLE.

IT WILL GIVE INFORMATION UPON THE PUBLIC DOMAIN, WESTERN SOILS, CLIMATE, ETC.; ANSWER INQUIRIES on all manner of subjects which come within its sphere; GIVE each week, full and RELIABLE MARKET, CROP, AND WEATHER REPORTS; PRESENT the family with choice and INTERESTING LITERATURE; amuse and INSTRUCT THE YOUNG FOLKS: AND, in a word, aim to BE, in every respect, AN INDISPENSABLE AND UNEXCEPTIONABLE farm and fireside COMPANION.

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This elegant 18K ROLLED GOLD WEDDING RING, equal in appearance to a $10 ring, FREE TO ALL. Wishing to at once secure a large number of new subscribers to our well known literary and family paper, BACKLOG SKETCHES, and knowing that all who once read it will become regular subscribers, we make this most liberal offer to induce all to subscribe, firmly believing that in the future we shall be benefited in the increased business it will bring us. For only 25 Cents we will send BACKLOG SKETCHES three months ON TRIAL, and we will send every subscriber, absolutely FREE, this elegant 18K ROLLED GOLD RING. For $1, we send Backlog Sketches a year and send every subscriber free, a beautiful RING, WARRANTED SOLID GOLD. Backlog Sketches is a large, 16 page, illustrated literary paper, size Harper's Weekly, every issue being filled with the most charming stories and sketches and choicest miscellany. It is alone worth double the subscription price. Subscribe now. Sample paper for stamp. Address

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* * * * *

A DANGEROUS AMBUSCADE.

Discovered Barely in Time—The Most Deceptive and Luring of Modern Evils Graphically Described.

(Syracuse Journal.)

Something of a sensation was caused in this city yesterday by a rumor that one of our best-known citizens was about to publish a statement concerning some unusual experiences during his residence in Syracuse. How the rumor originated it is impossible to say, but a reporter immediately sought Dr. S. G. Martin, the gentleman in question, and secured the following interview:

"What about this rumor, Doctor, that you are going to make a public statement of some important matters?"

"Just about the same as you will find in all rumors—some truth; some fiction. I had contemplated making a publication of some remarkable episodes that have occurred in my life, but have not completed it as yet."

"What is the nature of it, may I inquire?"

"Why, the fact that I am a human being instead of a spirit. I have passed through one of the most wonderful ordeals that perhaps ever occurred to any man. The first intimation I had of it was several years ago, when I began to feel chilly at night and restless after retiring. Occasionally this would be varied by a soreness of the muscles and cramps in my arms and legs. I thought, as most people would think, that it was only a cold and so paid as little attention to it as possible. Shortly after this I noticed a peculiar catarrhal trouble and my throat also became inflamed. As if this were not variety enough I felt sharp pains in my chest, and a constant tendency to headache."

"Why didn't you take the matter in hand and check it right where it was?"

"Why doesn't everybody do so? Simply because they think it is only some trifling and passing disorder. These troubles did not come all at once and I thought it unmanly to heed them. I have found, though, that every physical neglect must be paid for and with large interest. Men can not draw drafts on their constitution without honoring them sometime. These minor symptoms I have described, grew until they were giants of agony. I became more nervous; had a strange fluttering of the heart, an inability to draw a long breath and an occasional numbness that was terribly suggestive of paralysis. How I could have been so blind as not to understand what this meant I can not imagine."

"And did you do nothing?"

"Yes, I traveled. In the spring of 1879 I went to Kansas and Colorado, and while in Denver, I was attacked with a mysterious hemorrage of the urinary organs and lost twenty pounds of flesh in three weeks. One day after my return I was taken with a terrible chill and at once advanced to a very severe attack of pneumonia. My left lung soon entirely filled with water and my legs and body became twice their natural size. I was obliged to sit upright in bed for several weeks in the midst of the severest agony, with my arms over my head, and constant fear of suffocation."

"And did you still make no attempt to save yourself?"

"Yes, I made frantic efforts. I tried everything that seemed to offer the least prospect of relief. I called a council of doctors and had them make an exhaustive chemical and microscopical examination of my condition. Five of the best physicians of Syracuse and several from another city said I must die!

"It seemed as though their assertion was true for my feet became cold, my mouth parched, my eyes wore a fixed glassy stare, my body was covered with a cold, clammy death sweat, and I read my fate in the anxious expressions of my family and friends."

"But the finale?"

"Came at last. My wife, aroused to desperation, began to administer a remedy upon her own responsibility and while I grew better very slowly, I gained ground surely until, in brief, I have no trace of the terrible Bright's disease from which I was dying, and am a perfectly well man. This may sound like a romance, but it is true, and my life, health and what I am are due to Warner's Safe Cure, which I wish was known to and used by the thousands who I believe, are suffering this minute as I was originally. Does not such an experience as this justify me in making a public statement?"

"It certainly does. But then Bright's disease is not a common complaint, doctor."

"Not common! On the contrary it is one of the most common. The trouble is, few people know they have it. It has so few marked symptoms until its final stages that a person may have it for years, each year getting more and more in its power and not suspect it. It is quite natural I should feel enthusiastic over this remedy while my wife is even more so than I am. She knows of its being used with surprising results by many ladies for their own peculiar ailments, over which it has singular power."

The statement drawn out by the above interview is amply confirmed by very many of our most prominent citizens, among them being Judge Reigel, and Col. James S. Goodrich, of the Times, while Gen. Dwight H. Bruce and Rev. Prof. W. P. Coddington, D. D., give the remedy their heartiest indorsement. In this age of wonders, surprising things are quite common, but an experience so unusual as that of Dr. Martin's and occurring here in our midst, may well cause comment and teach a lesson. It shows the necessity of guarding the slightest approach of physical disorder and by the means which has been proven the most reliable and efficient. It shows the depth to which one can sink and yet be rescued and it proves that few people need suffer if these truths are observed.

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AGENTS make over ONE hundred per cent. profit selling the

REFLECTING SAFETY LAMP

which can be sold in every family. Gives more light than three ordinary lamps. SAMPLE LAMP SENT FOR FIFTY CENTS IN STAMPS. We have other household articles. Send for circulars.

FORSEE & MCMAKIN, CINCINNATI, O.

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PUBLICATIONS.

MARSHALL M. KIRKMAN'S BOOKS ON RAILROAD TOPICS.

DO YOU WANT TO BECOME A RAILROAD MAN

IF YOU DO, THE BOOKS DESCRIBED BELOW POINT THE WAY.

The most promising field for men of talent and ambition at the present day is the railroad service. The pay is large in many instances, while the service is continuous and honorable. Most of our railroad men began life on the farm. Of this class is the author of the accompanying books descriptive of railway operations, who has been connected continuously with railroads as a subordinate and officer for 27 years. He was brought up on a farm, and began railroading as a lad at $7 per month. He has written a number of standard books on various topics connected with the organization, construction, management and policy of railroads. These books are of interest not only to railroad men but to the general reader as well. They are indispensable to the student. They present every phase of railroad life, and are written in an easy and simple style that both interests and instructs. The books are as follows:

"RAILWAY EXPENDITURES—THEIR EXTENT, OBJECT AND ECONOMY."—A Practical Treatise on Construction and Operation. In Two Volumes, 850 pages. $4.00

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"TRAIN AND STATION SERVICE"—Giving The Principal Rules and Regulations governing Trains; 280 pages. 2.00

"THE TRACK ACCOUNTS OF RAILROADS."—And how they should be kept. Pamphlet. 1.00

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PRAIRIE FARMER PUBLISHING CO., 150 Monroe St. CHICAGO, ILL.

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HOUSEHOLD.

For nothing lovelier can be found In woman than to study household good.—Milton.

"GOING UP HEAD."

AN OLD SOLDIER'S STORY.

The low school-house stood in a green Wabash wood Lookin' out on long levels of corn like a sea— A little log-house, hard benches, and we, Big barefooted boys and rough 'uns, we stood In line with the gals and tried to get 'head At spellin' each day when the lessons was said.

But one, Bally Dean, tall, bony, and green As green corn in the milk, stood fast at the foot— Stood day after day, as if he'd been put A soldier on guard there did poor Bally Dean. And stupid! God made him so stupid I doubt— But I guess God who made us knows what He's about.

He'd a long way to walk. But he wouldn't once talk Of that, nor the chores for his mother who lay A shakin' at home. Still, day after day He stood at the foot till the class 'gan to mock! Then to master he plead, "Oh I'd like to go head!" Now it wasn't so much, but the way it was said.

Then the war struck the land! Why the barefooted band It just nailed up that door: and the very next day, With master for Cap'en, went marchin' away; And Bally the butt of the whole Wabash band. But he bore with it all, yet once firmly said, "When I get back home, I'm agoin' up head!"

Oh, that school-house that stood in the wild Wabash wood! The rank weeds were growin' like ghosts through the floor. The squirrels hulled nuts on the sill of the door. And the gals stood in groups scrapin' lint where they stood. And we boys! How we sighed; how we sickened and died For the days that had been, for a place at their side.

Then one fever-crazed and his better sense dazed And dulled with heart-sickness all duty forgot; Deserted, was taken, condemned to be shot! And Bally Dean guardin' his comrade half crazed, Slow paced up and down while he slept where he lay In the tent waitin' death at the first flush of day.

And Bally Dean thought of the boy to be shot, Of the fair girl he loved in the woods far away; Of the true love that grew like a red rose of May; And he stopped where he stood, and he thought and he thought Then a sudden star fell, shootin' on overhead. And he knew that his mother beckon'd onto the dead.

And he said what have I? Though I live though I die. Who shall care for me now? Then the dull, muffled drum Struck his ear, and he knew that the master had come With the squad. And he passed in the tent with a sigh, And the doomed lad crept forth, and the drowsy squad led With low trailin' guns to the march of the dead.

Then with face turned away tow'rd a dim streak of day, And his voice full of tears the poor bowed master said, As he fell on his knees and uncovered his head: "Come boys it is school time, let us all pray." And we prayed. And the lad by the coffin alone Was tearless, was silent, was still as a stone.

"In line," master said, and he stood at the head; But he couldn't speak now. So he drew out his sword And dropped the point low for the last fatal word. Then the rifles rang out, and a soldier fell dead! The master sprang forward. "Great Heaven," he said, "It is Bally, poor Bally, and he's gone up head!"

—Joaquin Miller.



TOO FAT TO MARRY.

A very fat young woman came to my office and asked to see me privately. When we were alone she said:

"Are you sure no one can overhear us?"

"Quite sure."

"You won't laugh at me, will you?"

"Madam, I should be unworthy of your confidence if I could be guilty of such a rudeness."

"Thank you, sir; but no one ever called upon you on such a ridiculous errand. You won't think me an idiot, will you?"

"I beg of you to go on."

"You don't care to know my name or residence?"

"Certainly not, if you care to conceal them."

"I have called to consult you about the strangest thing in the world. I will tell you all. I am twenty-three years old. When I was nineteen I weighed 122 pounds; now I weigh 209; I am all filling up with fat. I can hardly breathe. The best young man that ever lived loves me, and has been on the point of asking me to marry him, but of course he sees I am growing worse all the time and he don't dare venture. I can't blame him. He is the noblest man in the world, and could marry any one he chooses. I don't blame him for not wishing to unite himself to such a tub as I am. Why, Doctor, you don't know how fat I am. I am a sight to behold. And now I have come to see if any thing can be done. I know you have studied up all sorts of curious subjects, and I thought you might be able to tell me how to get rid of this dreadful curse."

She had been talking faster and faster, and with more and more feeling (after the manner of fat women, who are always emotional), until she broke down in hysterical sobs.

I inquired about her habits—table and otherwise. She replied:

"Oh, I starve myself; I don't eat enough to keep a canary bird alive, and yet I grow fatter and fatter all the time. I don't believe anything can be done for me. We all have our afflictions, and I suppose we ought to bear them with fortitude. I wouldn't mind for myself, but it's just breaking his heart; if it wasn't for him I could be reconciled."

I then explained to her our nervous system, and the bearing certain conditions of one class of nerves has upon the deposition of adipose tissue. I soon saw she was not listening, but was mourning her sorrow. Then I asked her if she would be willing to follow a prescription I might give her.

"Willing? willing?" she cried. "I would be willing to go through fire, or to have my flesh cut off with red-hot knives. There is nothing I would not be willing to endure if I could only get rid of this horrible condition."

I prepared a prescription for her, and arranged that she should call upon me once a week, that I might supervise her progress and have frequent opportunities to encourage her. The prescription which I read to her was this:

1. For breakfast eat a piece of beef or mutton as large as your hand, with a slice of white bread twice as large. For dinner the same amount of meat, or, if preferred, fish or poultry, with the same amount of farinaceous or vegetable food in the form of bread or potato. For supper, nothing.

2. Drink only when greatly annoyed with thirst; then a mouthful of lemonade without sugar.

3. Take three times a week some form of bath, in which there shall be immense perspiration. The Turkish bath is best. You must work, either in walking or some other way, several hours a day.

"But, doctor, I can't walk; my feet are sore."

"I thought that might be the case, but if the soles of your shoes are four inches broad, and are thick and strong, walking will not hurt your feet. You must walk or work until you perspire freely, every day of the week. Of course, you are in delicate health, with little endurance, but, as you have told me that you are willing to do anything, you are to work hard at something six or seven hours every day."

4. You must rise early in the morning, and retire late at night. Much sleep fattens people.

5. The terrible corset you have on, which compresses the center of the body, making you look a great deal fatter than you really are, must be taken off, and you must have a corset which any dress maker can fit to you—a corset for the lower part of the abdomen, which will raise this great mass and support it.

"This is all the advice I have to give you at present. At first you will lose half a pound a day. In the first three months you will lose from twenty to thirty pounds. In six months, forty pounds. You will constantly improve in health, get over this excessive emotion, and be much stronger. Every one knows that a very fat horse weighing 1,200 pounds, can be quickly reduced to 1,000 pounds with great improvement to activity and health. It is still easier with a human being. That you may know exactly what is being done, I wish you to be weighed; write the figures in your memorandum, and one week from now, when you come again, weigh yourself and tell me how much you have lost."

I happened to be out of the city and did not see her until her second visit, two weeks from our last meeting. It was plain when she entered that already her system was being toned up, and when we were again in my private office, she said:

"I have lost six and a half pounds; not quite as much as you told me, but I am delighted, though nearly starved. I have done exactly as you prescribed, and shall continue to if it kills me. You must be very careful not to make any mistakes, for I shall do just as you say. At first the thirst was dreadful. I thought I could not bear it. But now I have very little trouble with that."

About four months after our first meeting this young woman brought a handsome young man with her, and after a pleasant chat, she said to me:

"We are engaged; but I have told my friend that I shall not consent to become his wife until I have a decent shape. When I came to you I weighed 209 pounds; I now weigh 163 pounds. I am ten times as strong, active, and healthy as I was then, and I have made up my mind, for my friend has left it altogether to me, that when I have lost ten or fifteen pounds more, we shall send you the invitations."

As the wedding day approached she brought the figures 152 on a card, and exclaimed, with her blue eyes running over:

"I am the happiest girl in the world, and don't you think I have honestly earned it? I think I am a great deal happier than I should have been had I not worked for it."

The papers said the bride was beautiful. I thought she was, and I suppose no one but herself and husband felt as much interested in that beauty as I did. I took a sort of scientific interest in it.

We made the usual call upon them during the first month, and when, two months after the wedding, they were spending the evening with us, I asked him if his wife had told him about my relations with her avoirdupois? He laughed heartily, and replied:

"Oh, yes, she has told me everything, I suppose: but wasn't it funny?"

"Not very. I am sure you wouldn't have thought it funny if you could have heard our first interview. It was just the reverse of funny; don't you think so madam?"

"I am sure it was the most anxious visit I ever paid any one. Doctor, my good husband says he should have married me just the same, but I think he would have been a goose if he had."

"Yes," said the husband, "it was foreordained that we two should be one."

"To be sure it was," replied the happy wife, "because it was foreordained that I should get rid of those horrid fifty-seven pounds. I am going down till I reach one hundred and forty pounds, and there I will stop, unless my husband says one hundred and thirty. I am willing do anything to please him."—Dio Lewis' Monthly.



ORNAMENTS FOR HOMES.

It is not the most expensively furnished houses that are the most homelike, besides comparatively few persons have the means to gratify their love of pretty little ornaments with which to beautify their homes. It is really painful to visit some houses; there naked walls and cheerless rooms meet you yet there are many such, and children in them too. How much might these homes be brightened by careful forethought in making some little ornaments that are really of no expense, save the time.

Comb cases, card receivers, letter holders, match safes, paper racks, cornucopias, and many other pretty and useful things can easily be made of nice clean paste board boxes (and the boxes are to be found in a variety of colors). For any of these cut out the parts and nicely sew them together, and the seams and raw edges can be covered with narrow strips of bright hued paper or tape. Ornament them with transfer or scrap pictures.

I have seen very pretty vases for holding dried flowers and grasses, made of plain dark brown pasteboard, and the seams neatly covered with narrow strips of paper. Pretty ottomans can be made by covering any suitable sized box with a bit of carpeting, and stuffing the top with straw or cotton. Or, if the carpeting is not convenient, piece a covering of worsteds. A log cabin would be a pretty pattern.

To amuse the children during the long winter months, make a scrap-book of pictures. Collect all the old illustrated books, papers, and magazines, and cut out the pictures and with mucilage nicely paste them in a book, first removing alternate leaves so it will not be too bulky. Perhaps this last remark is slightly wandering from my subject, but I can't help it, I love the little folks and want them happy. Cares and trouble will come to them soon enough. Autograph albums are quite the rage nowadays, and children get the idea and quite naturally think it pretty nice, and want an album too. For them make a pretty album in the form of a boot. For the outside use plain red cardboard; for the inside leaves use unruled paper; fasten at the top with two tiny bows of narrow blue ribbon. A lady sent my little girl an autograph album after this pattern for a birthday present and it is very neat indeed. Any of the little folks who want a pattern of it can have it and welcome by sending stamp to pay postage. For the wee little girl make a nice rag doll; it will please her quite as well as a boughten one, and certainly last much longer. I have a good pattern for a doll which you may also have if you wish it. A nice receptacle for pins, needles, thread, etc., can be made in form of an easy chair or sofa. Cut the part of pasteboard and cover the seat, arms, and back with cloth, and stuff with cotton. Brackets made of pasteboard will do service a long time.

MRS. F. A. WARNER SOUTH SAGINAW, MICH.

* * * * *

RAILROADS.



A MAN WHO IS UNACQUAINTED WITH THE GEOGRAPHY OF THIS COUNTRY WILL SEE BY EXAMINING THIS MAP THAT THE

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R.R. CABLE, Vice-Pres. & Gen'l M'g'r,

E. ST. JOHN, Gen'l Tkt. & Pass. Agt.

CHICAGO.

* * * * *

MAPS.

RAND, McNALLY & CO.'S NEW RAILROAD —AND— COUNTY MAP —OF THE— UNITED STATES —AND— DOMINION OF CANADA.

Size, 4 x 2-1/2 feet, mounted on rollers to hang on the wall. This is an

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—IT SHOWS— ALL THE RAILROADS, —AND— EVERY COUNTY AND PRINCIPAL TOWN —IN THE— UNITED STATES AND CANADA.

A useful Map in every one's home, and place of business. PRICE, $2.00.

Agents wanted, to whom liberal inducements will be given. Address

RAND, McNALLY & CO., Chicago, Ill.

By arrangements with the publishers of this Map we are enabled to make the following liberal offer: To each person who will remit us $2.25 we will send copy of THE PRAIRIE FARMER One Year and THIS MAP POSTPAID. Address

PRAIRIE FARMER PUBLISHING CO., CHICAGO, ILL.

* * * * *

MISCELLANEOUS.

"FACTS ABOUT Arkansas and Texas."

A handsome book, beautifully illustrated, with colored diagrams, giving reliable information as to crops, population, religious denominations, commerce, timber, Railroads, lands, etc., etc.

Sent free to any address on receipt of a 2-cent stamp. Address

H.C. TOWNSEND, GEN. PASSENGER AGT., ST. LOUIS, MO.

* * * * *

500 VIRGINIA FARMS & MILLS

FOR SALE AND EXCHANGE. Write for free REAL ESTATE JOURNAL.

R.B. CHAFFIN & CO., Richmond, Virginia.

* * * * *

THE PRAIRIE FARMER is the Cheapest and Best Agricultural Paper published. Only $2.00 per year.

* * * * *

REMEMBER that $2.00 pays for THE PRAIRIE FARMER from this date to January 1, 1885; For $2.00 you get it for one year and a copy of THE PRAIRIE FARMER COUNTY MAP OF THE UNITED STATES, FREE! This is the most liberal offer ever made by any first-class weekly agricultural paper in this country.



OUR YOUNG FOLKS

CHAT ABOUT A BEAR.

As I promised you last week, I will try and tell you about the bear I saw a few months ago away down in Nova Scotia, not many miles from that quaint old city of Halifax. Do I hear some of THE PRAIRIE FARMER boys and girls exclaim, as a real grown-up lady did just before I left Chicago: "Halifax! why, yes, I have heard tell of the place, but did not think that anybody ever really went there." People do go there, however, by the hundreds in the summer time, and a most delightful, hospitable, charming class of inhabitants do they find the Blue Noses, as they are called—that is, when one goes to them very well introduced.

But we will have a little talk about Halifax and surroundings when you have heard about the bear.

Well, in the first place I did not, of course, see the bear in the city, but in a place called Sackville—a section of country about five miles long, and extending over hill and dale and valley; through woods and across streams. My host owned a beautiful farm—picturesquely beautiful only, not with a money-making beauty—situated upon the slope of a hill, where one could stand and look upon the most tender of melting sunsets, away off toward the broad old ocean.

One morning as we were all gathered upon the front stoop, grandpa, mamma, baby, kitten and all, we looked down the valley and saw coming up the hill, led by two men, an immense yellow bear. One of the farm hands was sent to call the men and the bear up to the house. The men, who were Swiss, were glad enough to come, as they were taking bruin through the country to show off his tricks and make thereby a little money.

The children were somewhat afraid at first, but soon felt quite safe when they saw he was firmly secured by a rope. Old bruin's keeper first gave him a drink of water, then poured a pailful over him, which he seemed to enjoy very much, as the day was a warm one. One of the men said something in Swiss, at which the bear gave a roar-like grunt and commenced to dance. Around and around the great lumbering fellow went on his two hind legs, holding his fore paws in the air. It was not what one would call a very "airy waltz," however. Again the keeper spoke, and immediately bruin threw himself upon the ground and turned somersaults, making us all laugh heartily. He then told him to shake hands (but all in Swiss), and it was too funny to see the great awkward animal waddle up on his hind legs and extend first one paw and then the other. But what interested us all most, both big and little, was to hear the man say, "Kisse me," and then to watch the bear throw out his long tongue and lick his keeper's face.

We then gave the bear some milk to drink, when suddenly he gave a bound forward toward the baby. But he was securely tied, as we well knew. The milk roused all the beast's savage instincts, one of the men said.

But what will interest you most of all will be the fact that on the farm (which consisted of five hundred acres, nearly all woodland) there were seen almost every morning the footprints of a real savage bear. The sheep were fast disappearing, and the farmers about were not a little worried. One day I went for a walk into these same woods, and such woods! you Western boys and girls could not possibly imagine them—the old moss-covered logs, and immense trees cut down years ago and left to lie there until all overgrown with mosses and lichens. I never before experienced such a feeling of solitude as in that walk of over a mile in length through those deep dark woods, where sometimes we had literally to cut our way through with our little hatchets (we always carried them with us when in the forest).

As I sauntered on, those lines of Longfellow's in Evangeline, came unconsciously to my mind, so exactly did they describe the place:

This is the forest primeval. The murmuring pines and the hemlocks, Bearded with moss, and in garments green, indistinct in the twilight, Stand like Druids of old, with voices sad and prophetic. Stand like harpers hoar, with beards that rest on their bosoms. Loud from its rocky caverns, the deep voiced neighboring ocean Speaks, and in accents disconsolate answers the wail of the forest.

Nova Scotia is, as you all know the Acadian country of which our own fireside poet writes so beautifully. It was but a few miles from where I was visiting that the scene of Evangeline, that exquisitely tender romance which so thrills the hearts of both old and young, was laid. As I drove through the country, coming ever and anon unexpectedly upon one of the many beautiful lakes from half a mile to two miles in length, in fancy I pictured the fair Evangeline and her guide, the good Father Felician, skirting these lakes in a light canoe as they traversed the whole and through in the sad and fruitless search for the lost lover Gabriel.

No wonder the soul of the poet was filled with such strange, mystic beauty which thus found expression in rhythm and song, for Acadia has an enchantment all its own and can best be interpreted by the diviner thought of the poet.

But I am afraid, boys and girls, that I have chatted with you so long now that there will be scarcely room this week to touch upon Halifax. But, however, if you wish, I will try and talk to you about it next week, and tell you of some of the winter sports the little Blue Noses indulge in in the winter time.

MARY HOWE.



A FAIRY STORY BY LITTLE JOHNNY.

Me an Billy we ben readn fairy tales, an I never see such woppers. I bet the feller wich rote em will be burnt every tiny little bit up wen he dies, but Billy says they are all true but the facks. Uncle Ned sed cude I tell one, and I ast him wot about, and he sed: "Wel Johnny, as you got to do the tellin I'le leav the choice of subjeck entirely to you; jest giv us some thing about a little boy that went and sook his forten."

So I sed: "One time there was a little boy went out for to seek his forten, and first thing he see was great big yello posy on a punkin vine."

Then Uncle Ned he sed: "Johnny, was that the punkin vine wich your bed once had a bizness connection with?" But I didn't anser, only went on with the story.

"So the little boy he wocked into the posy, and crold down the vine on his hands and kanees bout ten thousan hundred miles, till he come bime bi to a door, wich he opened an went in an found hisself in a grate big house, ofle nice like a kings pallows or a hotell. But the little boy dident find any body to home and went out a other door, where he see a ocion with a bote, and he got in the bote."

Then Uncle Ned he sed a uther time: "Johnny, excuse the ignance of a man wich has been in Injy an evry were, but is it the regular thing for punkin vines to have sea side resorts in em?"

But I only sed: "Wen the little boy had saild out of site of land the bote it sunk, and he went down, down, down in the water, like he was tied around the neck of a mill stone, till he was swollowed by a wale, cos wales is the largest of created beings wich plows the deep, but lions is the king of beests, an the American eagle can lick ol other birds, hooray! Wen the boy was a seekn his forten in the stummeck of the wales belly he cut to a fence, an wen he had got over the fence he found hisself in a rode runin thru a medder, and it was a ofle nice country fur as he cude see."

Uncle Ned sed: "Did he put up at the same way side inn wich was patternized by Jonah wen he pennitrated to that part of the morl vinyerd?"

But I said: "Bimebi he seen a rope hangin down from the ski, and he begin for to clime it up, a sayin, 'Snitchety, snatchety, up I go,' 'wot time is it old witch?' 'niggers as good as a white man,' 'fee-faw-fum,' 'Chinese mus go,' 'all men is equil fore de law,' 'blitherum, blatherum, boo,' and all the words of madgick wich he cude think of. After a wile it got reel dark, but he kep on a climeing, and pretty sune he see a round spot of dalite over his hed, and then he cum up out of a well in a grate city."

Jest then my father he came in, and he said: "Johnny, you get the bucket and go to the wel and fetch sum water for your mother to wash the potatoes."

But I said it was Billy's tern, and Billy he sed twasent no sech thing, and I said he lide, and he hit me on the snoot of my nose, and we fot a fite, but victery percht upon the banners of my father, cos he had a stick. Then wile me and Billy was crying Uncle Ned he spoke up and begun: "One time there was a grate North American fairy taler—"

But I jest fetched Mose a kick, wich is the cat, and went out and pitcht into Sammy Doppy, which licked me reel mean.

* * * * *

BREEDERS DIRECTORY.

The following list embraces the names of responsible and reliable Breeders in their line, and parties wishing to purchase or obtain information can feel assured that they will be honorably dealt with:

CATTLE.

Jersey.

Mills, Charles F.....................Springfield, Illinois

HORSES.

Clydesdales.

Mills, Charles F.....................Springfield, Illinois

SWINE.

Berkshire.

Mills, Charles F.....................Springfield, Illinois

Chester Whites.

W.A. Gilbert......................Wauwatosa Wis.

SHEEP.

Cotswold.

Mills, Charles F.....................Springfield, Illinois

* * * * *

LIVE STOCK, Etc.

Jersey Bulls.

JERSEY BREEDERS desiring young bulls of the most approved form and breeding, and representing the families most noted for large yields of butter, will serve their interests by addressing the undersigned.

Stock recorded in A. J. C. C. H. R.

* * * * *

Cotswold Sheep.

CHOICE representatives of this large and popular breed of sheep for sale at prices satisfactory to buyers.

Ewes and rams of different ages.

Breeding stock recorded in the American Cotswold Record.

CHAS. F. MILLS,

Springfield, Ill.

* * * * *

VICTORIA SWINE.



FALSTAFF.

Winner of First Prize Chicago Fat Stock Show 1878. Originators of this famous breed. Also breeders of Pekin Ducks and Light Brahma Fowls. Stock for sale. Send for circular A.

SCHIEDT & DAVIS,

Dyer, Lake Co. Ind.

* * * * *



We will send you a watch or a chain BY MAIL OR EXPRESS, C. O. D., to be examined before paying any money and if not satisfactory, returned at our expense. We manufacture all our watches and save you 30 per cent. Catalogue of 250 styles free.

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* * * * *

MEDICAL.

Weak Nervous Men



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Address Consulting Physician of MARSTON REMEDY CO., 46W. 14th St., New York.

* * * * *

TWO LADIES MET ONE DAY.

One said to the other "By the way how is that Catarrh of yours?" "Why it's simply horrid, getting worse every day." "Well, why don't you try 'DR. SYKES' SURE CURE,' I know it will cure you!" "Well, then I will, for I've tried everything else."

Just six weeks afterward they met again and No. 1 said. "Why, how much better you look, what's up! Going to get married, or what?" "Well, yes, and it's all owing to 'DR. SYKES' SURE CURE FOR CATARRH;' oh, why didn't I know of it before? it's simply wonderful."

Send 10 cents to Dr. C.R. Sykes, 181 Monroe street, Chicago, for valuable book of full information, and mention the "Two Ladies."

* * * * *

30 DAYS' TRIAL

DR. DYE'S



ELECTRO VOLTAIC BELT, and other ELECTRIC APPLIANCES. We will send on Thirty Days' Trial, TO MEN, YOUNG OR OLD, who are suffering from NERVOUS DEBILITY, LOST VITALITY, and those diseases of a PERSONAL NATURE resulting from ABUSES and OTHER CAUSES. Speedy relief and complete restoration to HEALTH, VIGOR and MANHOOD GUARANTEED. Send at once for Illustrated Pamphlet free. Address

VOLTAIC BELT CO., MARSHALL, MICH.

* * * * *

I CURE FITS!

When I say cure I do not mean merely to stop them for a time and then have them return again, I mean a radical cure. I have made the disease of FITS, EPILEPSY or FALLING SICKNESS a life-long study. I warrant my remedy to cure the worst cases. Because others have failed is no reason for not now receiving a cure. Send at once for a treatise and a Free Bottle of my infallible remedy. Give Express and Post Office. It costs you nothing for a trial, and I will cure you.

Address Dr. H. G. ROOT, 183 Pearl St., New York.

* * * * *

BEST QUALITY.



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New designs in Satin and Gold finish, with name, 10 cts. We offer $100 for a pack of cards any nicer work, or prettier styles. Samples free. EAGLE CARD WORKS, NEW HAVEN, CT.

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MISCELLANEOUS.

DIAMONDS FREE!

We desire to make the circulation of our paper 250,000 during the next six months. To accomplish which we will give absolutely free a genuine FIRST WATER Diamond Ring, and the Home Companion for one year, for only $2.00. Our reasons for making this unprecedented offer are as follows;

A newspaper with 200,000 subscribers can get 1c. per line per 1,000 of circulation for its advertising space, or $5,000 per issue MORE than it costs to produce and mail the paper. With but 10,000 or 20,000 subscribers, its advertising revenues do not pay expenses. Only the papers with mammoth circulations make fortunes for their owners, DERIVED FROM ADVERTISING SPACE. For these and other reasons, we regard 100,000 subscribers as being of more financial benefit to a paper than the paper is to the subscribers. With 100,000 or 200,000 bona-fide subscribers, we make $100,000 to $200,000 a year clear profit from advertising, above cost of publishing. Without a large circulation, we would lose money. Therefore, to secure a very large circulation, and thus receive high rates and large profits from advertising space, this ONLY EQUITABLE plan of conducting business is adopted.

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The stone is GUARANTEED to be no Alaska Diamond, Rhine Pebble, or other imitation, but a

WARRANTED GENUINE AND PURE DIAMOND.

If it is not found so by the most careful and searching tests, we will refund the money, enter the subscriber's name on our list, and have the paper mailed to him free during its existence. To the publisher of this paper has been sent a guarantee from the manufacturing Jeweler, from whom we obtain these rings, that they are just as represented, so that readers may rely upon the promises being fulfilled to the letter.

The second question is, IS THE PAPER A DESIRABLE FAMILY JOURNAL? YES. It contains contributions from the first writers of the times: fiction, choice facts, intellectual food of the most interesting, instructive and refined character. It is one of the

LEADING PAPERS OF THE PROGRESSIVE WEST.

We are determined to make it the most desirable and reliable paper in the United States; will spare no effort or money to achieve that object. Sample Copies sent free on application. Remit by draft, express, or new postal note, to

THE HOME COMPANION. N.W. Cor. Fourth and Race Streets, Cincinnati, O.

Don't fail to name the paper in which you see this advertisement.

* * * * *

Don't be Humbugged With Poor, Cheap Coulters.



All farmers have had trouble with their Coulters. In a few days they get to wabbling, are condemned and thrown aside. In our

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we furnish a tool which can scarcely be worn out; and when worn, the wearable parts, a prepared wood journal, and movable thimble in the hub (held in place by a key) can be easily and cheaply renewed. WE GUARANTEE OUR "BOSS" to plow more acres than any other three Coulters now used.

OUR "O. K." CLAMP

Attaches the Coulter to any size or kind of beam, either right or left hand plow. We know that after using it you will say it is THE BEST TOOL ON THE MARKET. Ask your dealer for it.

Manufactured by the BOSS COULTER CO., Bunker Hill, Ills.



LITERATURE.

FOR THOSE WHO FAIL.

"All honor to him who shall win the prize," The world has cried for a thousand years, But to him who tries and who fails and dies I give great honor and glory and tears.

Give glory and honor and pitiful tears To all who fail in their deeds sublime, Their ghosts are many in the van of years, They were born with Time in advance of Time.

Oh, great is the hero who wins a name, But greater many and many a time Some pale-faced fellow who dies in shame And lets God finish the thought sublime.

And great is the man with a sword undrawn, And good is the man who refrains from wine; But the man who fails and yet still fights on, Lo, he is the twin-born brother of mine.

—Joaquin Miller.



A SINGULAR PHILOSOPHER.

Hon. Henry Cavendish was born in England, Oct. 10, 1731, and died Feb. 21, 1810. Cavendish was the son of Lord Charles Cavendish, a son of the Duke of Devonshire; and his mother was Lady Anne Grey, daughter of Henry, Duke of Kent. It is thus seen that the subject of this sketch belonged to two of the two most aristocratic, noble families in England, having for grandfathers the Dukes of Kent and Devonshire. This man, who became one of the most distinguished chemists and physicists of the age, born in high life, of exalted position and wealth, passed through the period of his boyhood and early manhood in utter obscurity, and a dense cloud rests upon his early life. Indeed, the place of his birth has been in dispute; some of his biographers asserting that he was born in England, others that he was born in France or Italy. It is now known that he was born at Nice, whither his mother had gone for the sake of health.

It seems incredible that one highly distinguished, who lived and died so recently, should have almost entirely escaped observation until he had reached middle life. From fragments of his early history which have been collected, we learn that he was a peculiar boy,—shy, reticent, fond of solitary walks, without playfellows, and utterly insensible to the attractions of home and social life. He was born with inflexible reserve; and the love of retirement so manifest in in later life mastered all his instincts even when a boy. If he had been of poor and obscure parentage, it would not seem so strange that one who for nearly fifty years was a Fellow of the Royal Society, and for a lengthened period a member of the Institute of France, and an object of European interest to men of science, had no one to record the incidents of his early life. But he lost his mother when almost an infant, and this sad event probably influenced greatly his early career, and isolated him from the world in which he lived.

We find him at Dr. Newcome's school at Hackney in 1742, and from this school he went directly to Cambridge, where he remained until 1753. He did not graduate, true to his odd instincts, although he spent the full period for a degree at Cambridge. No records of his college life have been preserved, and, as he went to London, it is wonderful that the next ten years of his life remain a blank. He joined the Royal Society in 1760, but contributed nothing until 1766, when he published his first paper on "Factitious Airs." Cavendish was a great mathematician, electrician, astronomer, meteorologist, and as a chemist he was equally learned and original. He lived at a time when science was to a large extent but blank empiricism; even the philosophy of combustion was based on erroneous and absurd hypotheses, and the speculation of experimenters were wild and fantastic. He was the first to submit these speculations to crucial tests, to careful and accurate experiment; and the results which were given to the world introduced a new era in scientific knowledge. We have so much to say regarding the man, that we can only present a brief outline of his great discoveries. Alone, in a spacious house on Clapham Common, outside of London, did this singular man work through many long years, until he filled it with every possible device capable of unfolding or illustrating principles in science.

At the time of a visit to London in 1856 this famous house was standing, and remained as it was when the owner left it, about a half century before. The exterior of the house would not attract special attention; but within, the whole world could not, perhaps, furnish a parallel. Anvils and forges, files and hammers, grindstones and tempering-troughs, furnaces and huge bellows, had converted the panelled and wall-frescoed drawing-room into the shop of a blacksmith. In the spacious dining-room chemical apparatus occupied the place of furniture. Electrical machines, Leyden-jars, eudiometers, thermometric scales, philosophical instruments, were distributed through the chambers. The third story, save two bed-chambers,—one for the housekeeper, the other for the footman,—had been fitted up for an observatory. The lenses and achromatic glasses, tubes and specula, concave mirrors, and object-prisms, and the huge, rough old telescope, peering through the roof, were still there as their owner had left them. All appliances of housekeeping were absent, and Cavendish House was destitute of all comforts, for which the owner had no taste.

In this house Cavendish lived for nearly half a century, totally isolated from the world and all human sympathies. He seldom or never visited relatives, and they were never guests at his house. He had several servants, all of whom were males, with one exception. He was shy of women, and did not like to have them come in his way. If he saw his female servant in any of the rooms, he would order her away instantly, or fly himself to other quarters. Rarely, during all the years of his solitary life, did a woman cross his threshold; and, when one did, he would run from her as if she brought the plague. His servants were all trained to silence, and in giving his orders the fewest words possible were used. His meals were served irregularly, whenever in the intervals of absorbing labors, he could snatch a fragment of time. He uniformly dined upon one kind of meat,—a joint of mutton; and he seemed to have no knowledge that there were other kinds in the market.

Upon one occasion he had invited a few scientific friends to dinner at Cavendish House, and when his servant asked him what he should provide, "A leg of mutton!" said Cavendish. "It will hardly be enough," said the servant. "Well, then get two." "Anything else, sir?" "Yes, get four legs of mutton."

His dress was peculiar,—a snuff-colored coat reaching to his knees, a long vest of the same color, buff breeches, and a three-cornered hat. With him the fashion never changed; he had but one suit; not an extra coat, hat, or even two handkerchiefs. When his wardrobe gave out, and he was forced to see his tailor, he became very nervous. He would walk the room in agony, give orders to have the tailor sent for, and then immediately countermand the same. His shoes for fifty years were of one pattern; and when he took them off they were put in one place behind a door, and woe to the servant who accidentally displaced them. He hung his old three-cornered hat on one peg at his house, and when he attended the meetings of the Royal Society he had a peg in the hall known as "Cavendish's peg." If, through accident, it was taken by some member before his arrival, he would stop, look at the occupied peg, and then turn on his heel, and go back to his house. When he went to the meetings, he walked in the middle of the street, never on the sidewalk; and he invariably took the same route. Upon reaching the steps leading to the rooms, he would stop, hesitate, put his hand on the door-handle, and look about timidly, and sometimes return at a rapid pace.

His cane, which he carried for fifty years, he placed upright in his left boot, which he took off at the door, covering his foot with a slipper. Once inside the rooms of the Royal Society, and surrounded by the most distinguished men of England and the world, he became excessively shy, and read his wonderful papers in an awkward manner. Applause of any kind he could not bear; and if in conversation any one praised his researches or papers, he would turn away abruptly, as if highly indignant. If he was appealed to as authority upon any point, he would dart away, and perhaps quit the hall for the evening. This man of great genius and vast acquirements was incapable of understanding or enduring praise or flattery. He sought in every possible way to escape recognition or notice, listened attentively to conversation, but seldom asked questions; never spoke of himself, or of what he had accomplished in the world of science.

Cavendish was a man possessed of vast wealth, and, when he died, he was the richest bank-owner in all England.

"At the age of forty, a large accession came to his fortune. His income already exceeded his expenditure. Pecuniary transactions were his aversion. Other matters occupied his attention. The legacy was therefore paid in to his bankers. It was safe there, and he gave it no more heed. One of the firm sought to see him at Clapham. In answer to the inquiries of the footman as to his Business, the banker replied to see Mr. Cavendish personally. 'You must wait, then,' responded the servant, 'till he rings his bell.' The banker tarried for hours, when the long-expected bell rang. His name was announced. 'What does he want?' the master was heard to ask. 'A personal interview.' 'Send him up.' The banker appeared.

"'I am come, sir, to ascertain your views concerning a sum of two hundred thousand pounds placed to your account.'

"'Does it inconvenience you?' asked the philosopher. 'If so, transfer it elsewhere.'

"'Inconvenience, sir? By no means,' replied the banker. 'But pardon me for suggesting that it is too large a sum to remain unproductive. Would you not like to invest it?'

"'Invest it? Eh? Yes, if you will. Do as you like, but don't interrupt me about such things again. I have other matters to think about.'"

With all his wealth it never occurred to him that others were in need, and that he might do good by benefactions. Solicited on one occasion to contribute to a charitable object, he exclaimed, "Give, eh! What do you want? How much?" "Give whatever you please, sir," said the solicitor. "Well, then, will ten thousand pounds do?"

On another occasion he was forced, from circumstances, to attend a christening in a church; and, when it was intimated to him that it was customary to bestow some little present upon the attending nurse, he ran up to her, and poured into her lap a double handful of gold coins, and hastily departed. This was the only occasion on which he was known to cross the threshold of a church. Cavendish died possessed of five million dollars of property, and yet at no time had he the slightest knowledge of how much he had, and how it was invested. He despised money, and made as little use of it as possible.

As regards matters of religion, he never troubled himself about them. He would never talk upon the subject, and probably never gave it a thought. All days of the week were alike to him: he was as busy on Sunday as on any other day. When asked by a friend what his views were of God, he replied, "Don't ask me such questions: I never think of them."

The circumstances of Cavendish's death are as remarkable as his career in life.

"Without premitory disease or sickness, or withdrawal from daily duties, or decadence of mental powers, or physical disability, he made up his mind that he was about to die. Closing his telescopes, putting his achromatic glasses in their several grooves, locking the doors of his laboratories, destroying the papers he deemed useless, and arranging those corrected for publication, he ascended to his sleeping-apartment and rang his bell. A servant appeared.

"'Edgar,' said Cavendish, addressing him by name, 'listen! Have I ever commanded you to do an unreasonable thing?'

"The man heard the question without astonishment, for he knew his master's eccentricities, and replied in the negative.

"'And that being the case,' continued the old man, 'I believe I have a right to be obeyed.'

"The domestic bowed his assent.

"'I shall now give you my last command,' Cavendish went on to say, 'I am going to die. I shall, upon your departure, lock my room. Here let me be alone for eight hours. Tell no one. Let no person come near. When the time has passed, come and see if I am dead. If so, let Lord George Cavendish know. This is my last command. Now, go.'

"The servant knew from long experience that to dispute his master's will would be useless. He bowed, therefore, and turned to go away.

"'Stay—one word!' added Cavendish. 'Repeat exactly the order I have given.'

"Edgar repeated the order, promised obedience once more, and retired from the chamber."

The servant did not keep his promise, but called to his master's bedside Sir Everard Home, a distinguished physician.

"Sir Everard inquired if he felt ill.

"'I am not ill,' replied Cavendish; 'but I am about to die. Don't you think a man of eighty has lived long enough? Why am I disturbed? I had matters to arrange. Give me a glass of water.'

"The glass of water was handed to him; he drank it, turned on his back, closed his eyes, and died.

"This end of a great man, improbable as are some of the incidents narrated, is no fiction of imagination. Sir Everard Home's statement, read before the Royal Institution, corroborates every particular. The mental constitution of the philosopher, puzzling enough during his life, was shrouded certainly in even greater mystery in his death."

It is as a chemist that Cavendish stands preeminent. Without instructors, without companionship, in the solitary rooms of his dwelling, he meditated and experimented. The result of his researches he communicated in papers read to the Royal Society, and these are quite numerous. He was the first to demonstrate the nature of atmospheric air and also of water. He was the discoverer of nitrogen and several gaseous bodies. He did much to overthrow the phlogiston theory, which was universally accepted in his time; and his researches upon arsenic were of the highest importance. There is scarcely any department of chemistry which he did not enrich by his discoveries. He was a close student of electrical phenomena, and made many discoveries in this department of research. He was also an astronomer and observed the heavens with his telescopes with the deepest interest. Some of his most important discoveries were unknown until after his death, as they were hidden in papers, which, for some reason, he would not publish.

The life of this singular man was morally a blank, and can only be described by negations. He did not love; he did not hate; he did not hope; he did not worship. He separated himself from his fellow-men and from his God. There was nothing earnest, enthusiastic, heroic, in his nature, and as little that was mean, groveling, or ignoble. He was passionless, wholly destitute of emotion. Everything that required the exercise of fancy, imagination, faith, or affection, was distasteful to Cavendish. He had a clear head for thinking, a pair of eyes for observing, hands for experimenting and recording, and these were all. His brain was a calculating engine; his eyes, inlets of vision, not fountains of tears; his heart, an anatomical organ necessary for the circulation of the blood. If such a man can not be loved, he can not be abhorred or despised. He was as the Almighty made him, and he served an important end in the world.

Such a man manifestly would never sit for his portrait. And he never did. It was taken by Borrow the painter, unobserved by Cavendish, while at a dinner-party given for the express purpose of securing the likeness. It is now in the British Museum. Cuts of this painting are rare.—Popular Science News.

* * * * *

THE PRAIRIE FARMER

AND

YOUTH'S COMPANION

ONE YEAR, $3 FOR THE TWO.

It is not required that both papers be sent to one address, nor to the same post-office.

Address PRAIRIE FARMER PUB. CO., 150 Monroe Street, Chicago.

* * * * *

SEEDS, Etc.

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* * * * *



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* * * * *

J. B. ROOT & CO.'S



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HUMOROUS

THE DONKEY'S DREAM.

A donkey laid him down to sleep, And as he slept and snored full deep, He was observed (strange sight) to weep, As if in anguished mood.

A gentle mule that lay near by, The donkey roused, and, with a sigh, In kindly voice inquired why Those tears he did exude.

The donkey, while he trembled o'er And dropped cold sweat from every pore, Made answer in a fearful roar: "I dreamed I was a dude!"



TOM TYPO.

Tom Typo was a printer good, A merry, cheerful elf; And whatsoever care he had, He still "composed" himself.

Where duty called him he was found Still working in his place; But nothing tempted from his post— Which really was the "case."

He courted pretty Emma Grey, One of earth's living gems— The sweetest Em, he used to say, Among a thousand "ems."

So "chased" was Emma's love for Tom, It met admiring eyes; She "proved" a "copy" to her sex. And wanted no "revise."

And Tom, he kept his "pages" clear And grew to be a "type" Of all that manhood holds most dear, When he with age was ripe.

He made his last "impression" here While yet his heart was warm, Just in the "nick" closed his career, And death "locked up his form."

He sank into his final rest Without one sigh or moan; His latest words—"Above my breast Place no 'imposing stone.'"



COURTSHIP OF A VASSAR GIRL.

The parents and the old relatives are chatting over their darling's future. Meanwhile the fiances have escaped into the back parlor.

Virginia—Where are you leading me to, John?

John—I wish to tell you, while others forget us, how happy I am to marry you—you, so winning, so witty, the gem of Vassar College.

Virginia—Oh! how many compliments to a poor graduate who only won the premium of rhetoric, and was second best in geometry.

John—I love you, and worship you just as you are.

V.—Oh, my friend, how anaphorical, and especially how epanaletical.

J.—I don't understand.

V.—I mean that you repeat yourself. It is the custom of lovers to abuse of the gorgiaques figures from the very protasis and exordium.

J.—I love you because you are accomplished and perfect.

V.—Did I not know you, I should think that you favored asteisin and ethossoia.

J. (Somewhat abashed.)—Ah! do you see * * *

V.—Why this aposiopesis?

J.—Aposiopesis!

V.—This reticence?

J.—That is clearer. I acknowledge that the expressions you use annoy and trouble me.

V.—You, on your side, speak a language stamped with schematism, while to be correct, even in making love, your language should be discursive. Allow me to tell you so frankly.

J.—Anyhow, you do not doubt my love?

V.—I pardon this epitrope, but pray use less metaphor and more litotes in the prosopography you dedicate to my modest entity—

J.—What will you? Men love women; I am a man; therefore, I love you.

V.—Your syllogism is perfect in its premises, but the conclusion is false.

J.—Oh! you are a cruel angel!

V.—I like that catachresis, but once again I repeat, I am practical, and prefer synedoche.

J. [Very much perplexed.]—Will you continue the conversation in the garden?

V.—Yes. (They go into the garden.) Look, here is a very lovely parallelogram of green surrounded by petasites. Let us sit under those maritamboues will you?

J.—Willingly! Ah! here I am happy! My heart fills with joy; it seems to me it contains the universe.

V.—You are speaking pure Spinozism.

J.—When I think that you will be my wife, and I your husband! What will be our destiny!

V.—The equation being given you are looking for the unknown quantity. Like you, I shall await the co-efficient.

J. (Who is determined to follow out his own thoughts)—With the world of constellations above us, and nature surrounding us, admire with me those orbs sending us their pure light. Look up there at that star.

V.—It is Allioth, neighbor to the polar star. They are nearing the cosmical moment, and if we remain here a few moments longer the occultation will take place.

J. (Resignedly.)—And there those thousands of stars.

V.—It is the galaxy. Admire also the syzygy of those orbs.

J. (Exhausted.)—And the moon; do you see the moon?

V.—It is at its zenith; it will be at its nadir in fifteen days, unless there are any occultations in the movements of that satellite.

J.—How happy I am!

(They go indoors.)

* * * * *

The owner of a soap factory, who had been complained of for maintaining a nuisance, was terribly put out at the charge and explained to the court: "Your honor, the odors complained of can not exist!" "But here are twenty complaints." "Yes, but I have worked in my factory for the last fifteen years, and I'll take my oath I can not detect any smells." "As a rule, prisoner," replied the judge, as he sharpened his spectacles on his bootleg, "the best noses are on the outside of soap factories. You are fined $25 and costs." Moral: Where a soap factory and a school-house are at loggerheads the school should be removed.

* * * * *

THE PRAIRIE FARMER

AND

YOUTH'S COMPANION

ONE YEAR, $3 FOR THE TWO.

It is not required that both papers be sent to one address, nor to the same post-office.

Address PRAIRIE FARMER PUB. CO., 150 Monroe Street, Chicago.

* * * * *

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SCALES.

U.S. STANDARD SCALES, MANUFACTURED EXPRESSLY FOR THE PRAIRIE FARMER

Every Scale Guaranteed by the Manufacturers, and by Us, to be Perfect, and to give the Purchaser Satisfaction.

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To any person ordering either size Wagon Scale at prices given below.



2-Ton Wagon or Farm Scale (Platform 6 x 12 feet), $35; 3-Ton (7 x 13), $45; 5-Ton (8 x 14), $55. Beam Box, Brass Beam, Iron Levers, Steel Bearings, and full directions for setting up.

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To any person ordering either of the following Scales, at prices named below.



The Housekeeper's Scale—$4.00

Weighing accurately from 1/4 oz. to 25 lbs. This is also a valuable Scale for Offices for Weighing Mail Matter. Tin Scoop, 50c. extra; Brass 75c. extra.



The Family Scale—$7.00.

Weighs from 1/4 oz. to 240 lbs. Small articles weighed in Scoop, large ones on Platform. Size of Platform, 10-1/2 x 13-1/2 in.



The Prairie Farmer Scale—$10.00

Weighs from 2 oz. to 320 lbs. Size of Platform 14 x 19 inches. A convenient Scale for Small Farmers, Dairymen, etc.



Platform Scales—4 Sizes. 400 lbs., $15; 600 lbs., $20; 900 lbs., $24; 1,200 lbs., $28; Wheels and Axles, $2 extra.

In ordering, give the Price and Description given above. All Scales Boxed and Delivered at Depot in Chicago. Give full shipping directions. Send money by Draft on Chicago or New York Post Office Order or Registered Letter. Address

THE PRAIRIE FARMER PUBLISHING COMPANY, CHICAGO, ILL.

* * * * *

MISCELLANEOUS

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* * * * *

SEEDS

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Dealer in Timothy, Clover, Flax, Hungarian, Millet, Red Top, Blue Grass, Lawn Grass, Orchard Grass, Bird Seeds, &c.

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GENERAL NEWS.

The State tax of Florida this year is but three mills.

Hog cholera is again raging in Champaign county, Ill.

A cat show is to be held in New York, beginning on the 23d inst.

Ice harvesters along the Hudson river are on a strike for higher wages.

The Ohio river is rapidly rising from the melting of heavy bodies of snow.

Several heavy failures among grain dealers of New York occurred last week.

Senator Anthony is unable to attend to the duties as President pro tem of the Senate.

The glucose works at Buffalo N. Y., have been removed to Peoria, Ill., and Levenworth, Kansas.

On Friday last one murderer was hung in Virginia, another in South Carolina, and still another in California.

A very heavy snow storm prevailed in Western and Northern N. Y., last week. It also extended to New England.

The State Senate of Texas has passed a bill giving the public domain, except homesteads to actual settlers, to the public schools.

There were over four thousand suicides in Paris last year, which is attributed to the tremendous pace at which the people live in France.

The starch-sugar industry of the country consumes forty thousand bushels of corn per day, and the product is valued at about $10,000,000 per year.

In attempting to slaughter a flock of prairie chickens near Fort Sill, a party of eight hunters grew so careless that three of their number were badly wounded.

The employes in three of the nail-mills at Wareham, Mass., struck, Saturday, against reducing their wages ten per cent. The nailers and puddlers of Plymouth also struck.

Canada is raising a standing army of 1,200 men to serve for three years. The full number applied at the recruiting office in Montreal, where the quota was only one hundred.

The Grand Orient of France has issued an appeal to all the lodges of freemasons in the world asking a renewal of unity between the Grand Orient and all other branches of the masonic rite.

The situation in Tonquin effectually ties the hands of France. The announcement of the blocking of Canton harbor is the only important event of the week in the Franco-Chinese struggle.

Dr. Tanner, the famous faster, is practicing medicine in Jamestown, N. Y. The physicians of that city have made a fruitless attempt to secure his indictment by the grand jury as an illegal practitioner.

The French press are advocating an organized effort against the prohibition of the importation of American pork. The prohibition, it is estimated, will cost the French ports 100,000,000 francs, and deprive the working people, besides, of cheap and wholesome food.

Articles of incorporation were filed at Springfield, Saturday, for the building of a railroad from a point within five miles of the northeast corner of Cook county to a point in Rock Island county, on the Mississippi, opposite Muscatine, Iowa. The capital is $3,000,000, and among the incorporators are Joseph R. Reynolds, Edgar Terhune Holden, and Josiah Browne, of Chicago.



CONGRESSIONAL.

Senator Edmunds has again been chosen president pro tem of the Senate. Mr. Anthony, of Rhode Island, declares himself too ill to perform the duties of the position. On Monday nearly 500 bills were introduced into the House. The total number of bills introduced and referred since the session began, reaches nearly 4,000. There are many important measures among them, while there are more that are of somewhat doubtful import, especially those which look to a still further increase of the pension appropriations. There are bills for the regulation of banks and banking; several new bankruptcy acts; one reducing the fees on patents as follows: The fee upon filing original application for a patent is reduced from $15 to $5. The minimum fees for a design patent shall be $5 instead of $10 and the minimum term for which granted shall be five instead of three and a half years; a bill to reorganize the infantry branch of the army; for reorganizing and increasing the navy; several to revise the tariff; to look after the forfeiture of land grants; to restrict importation of foreign adulterated goods; to stamp out contagious diseases of animals; to establish a department of commerce; to repeal the act prohibiting ex-confederate officers from serving in the United States army; to relieve Fitz John Porter, and hundreds of bills for the relief or benefit of individuals in different parts of the country. There are also bills for the regulation of transportation companies and for the establishment of a system of government telegraph. As yet no appropriation bills have been reported and the Ways and Means committee has but recently organized into subcommittees and has not begun the consideration of any subject. There is already business enough before this Congress to keep it in continuous session for years.



MARKETS.

FINANCIAL AND COMMERCIAL.

OFFICE OF THE PRAIRIE FARMER, CHICAGO. Jan 15, 1884.

There is an increased financial activity over last week. Bankers, on Monday, felt quite certain of a brisk week and were correspondingly cheerful. Interest rates are unchanged, being 6 and 7 per cent.

Eastern exchange sold between banks at 60@70c per $1,000 premium, and closed firm.

There is no change in Government securities.

The New York stock market was weak, and it is reported that the New York millionaires such as Gould, Vanderbilt, Sage, etc., have suffered to the extent of several millions each by the late general shrinkage in the value of stocks. Nevertheless, it is in such times as these that the Vanderbilts of the country reap their richest harvests. They have money to buy depressed stock with, and when the wheel turns their investments again add to their wealth. The little fellows have to sacrifice all their cash and then go to the wall.

Government securities are as follows:

4's coupons, 1907 Q. Apr. 123-1/4 4's reg., 1907 Q. Apr. 123-1/4 4-1/2's coupon, 1891 Q. Mar. 114-1/8 4-1/2's registered, 1891 Q. Mar. 114-1/8 3's registered Q. Mar. 100

GRAIN AND PROVISIONS.

There was more of a speculative feeling in the Chicago grain and provision markets yesterday than for some time. There was something of a recovery from the panicky feeling of Saturday, when the bulls had complete charge of the prices, but there was no advance.

FLOUR was unchanged, the article not yet feeling the uncertain condition of the wheat market.

Choice to favorite white winters $5 25@5 50 Fair to good brands of white winters 4 75@5 00 Good to choice red winters 5 00@5 50 Prime to choice springs 4 75@5 00 Good to choice export stock, in sacks, extras 4 25@4 50 Good to choice export stock, double extras 4 50@4 65 Fair to good Minnesota springs 4 50@4 75 Choice to fancy Minnesota springs 5 25@5 75 Patent springs 6 00@6 50 Low grades 2 25@3 50

WHEAT.—Red winter, No. 2, 97@99c; car lots of spring. No. 2, sold at 89@90-1/2c; No. 3, do. 84-1/2@85c.

CORN.—Moderately active. Car lots No 2, 53@53-7/8c; rejected, 46-1/2; new mixed, 49c.

OATS.—No. 2 in store, closed 32-1/2@32-3/4.

RYE.—May, in store 58@58-1/2.

BARLEY.—No. 2, 59 in store; No. 3, 52-1/2c.

FLAX.—Closed at $1 45 on track.

TIMOTHY.—$1 28@1 35 per bushel. Little doing.

CLOVER.—Quiet at $6 15@6 35 for prime.

PROVISIONS.—Mess pork, February, $14 75@ 14 78 per bbl; Green hams, 9-1/2c per lb. Short ribs, $7 47-1/2 per cwt.

LARD.—January, $9 20; February, $9 75.

LUMBER.

Lumber unchanged. Quotations for green are as follows:

Short dimension, per M $ 9 50@10 00 Long dimension, per M 10 00@11 50 Boards and strips, No. 2 11 00@13 00 Boards and strips, medium 13 00@16 00 Boards and strips, No. 1 choice 16 00@20 00 Shingles, standard 2 10@ 2 20 Shingles, choice 2 25@ 2 30 Shingles, extra 2 40@ 2 60 Lath 1 65@ 1 70

COUNTRY PRODUCE.

NOTE.—The quotations for the articles named in the following list are generally for commission lots of goods and from first hands. While our prices are based as near as may be on the landing or wholesale rates, allowance must be made for selections and the sorting up for store distribution.

BEANS.—Hand picked mediums $2 00@2 10. Hand picked navies, $2 15@2 20.

BUTTER.—Dull and without change. Choice to extra creamery, 32@35c per lb.; fair to good do 25@32c; fair to choice dairy, 23@28c; common to choice packing stock fresh and sweet, 18@22c; ladle packed 10@13c; fresh made, streaked butter, 9@11c.

BRAN.—Quoted at $11 87-1/2@13 50 per ton; extra choice $13.

BROOM-CORN—Good to choice hurl 6-1/2@7-1/2c per lb; green self-working 5@6c; red-tipped and pale do 4@5c; inside and covers 3@4c; common short corn 2-1/2@3-1/2c; crooked, and damaged, 2@4c, according to quality.

CHEESE.—Choice full-cream cheddars 13@13-1/2c per lb; medium quality do 9@10c; good to prime full cream flats 13@13-3/4c; skimmed cheddars 9@10c; good skimmed flats 6@7c; hard-skimmed and common stock 3@4c.

EGGS.—In a small way the best brands are quotable at 25@26c per dozen; 20@23c for good ice house stock; 18@19c per pickled.

HAY.—No 1 timothy $10@10 50 per ton; No 2 do $8 50@9 50; mixed do $7@8; upland prairie $8 00@10 75; No 1 prairie $6@7; No 2 do $4 50@5 50. Small bales sell at 25@50c per ton more than large bales.

HIDES AND PELTS.—Green-cured light hides 8-1/4c per lb; do heavy cows 8c; No 2 damaged green-salted hides 6c; green-salted calf 12@12-1/2 cents; green-salted bull 6 c; dry-salted hides 11 cents; No. 2 two-thirds price; No. 1 dry flint 14@14-1/2c. Sheep pelts salable at 28@32c for the estimated amount of wash wool on each pelt. All branded and scratched hides are discounted 15 per cent from the price of No. 1.

HOPS.—Prime to choice New York State hops 25@26c per lb; Pacific coast of 23@26c; fair to good Wisconsin 15@20c.

POULTRY.—Prices for good to choice dry picked and unfrozen lots are: Turkeys 13@14c per lb; chickens 9@10c; ducks 12@13c; geese 9@11c. Thin, undesirable, and frozen stock 2@3c per lb less than these figures; live offerings nominal.

POTATOES.—Good to choice 37@40c per bu. on track; common to fair 30@35c. Illinois sweet potatoes range at $3 50@4 per bbl for yellow. Baltimore stock at $2 25@2 75, and Jerseys at $5. Red are dull and nominal.

TALLOW AND GREASE.—No 1 country tallow 7@7-1/4c per lb; No 2 do 6-1/4@6-1/2c. Prime white grease 6@6-1/2c; yellow 5-1/4@5-3/4c; brown 4-1/2@5.

VEGETABLES.—Cabbage, $8@12 per 100; celery, 25@35c per doz bunches; onions, $1 00@1 25 per bbl for yellow, and $1 for red; turnips, $1 35@1 50 per bbl for rutabagas, and $1 00 for white flat.

WOOL.—from store range as follows for bright wools from Wisconsin, Illinois, Michigan, Indiana, and Eastern Iowa—dark Western lots generally ranging at 1@2c per lb. less.

Coarse and dingy tub 25@30 Good medium tub 31@34 Unwashed bucks' fleeces 14@15 Fine unwashed heavy fleeces 18@22 Fine light unwashed heavy fleeces 22@23 Coarse unwashed fleeces 21@22 Low medium unwashed fleeces 24@25 Fine medium unwashed fleeces 26@27 Fine washed fleeces 32@33 Coarse washed fleeces 26@28 Low medium washed fleeces 30@32 Fine medium washed fleeces 34@35