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Now if my object were money, as some seemed to think, I had then a fair opportunity to tell him a falsehood, and say, "I indeed received from the English that sum, but I have expended so and so, and cannot leave them unless I restore the whole." In this way I might have contrived to take what I wished. Yet I did not so answer him, but declared to him the truth, how much wages I had received, and which was nothing extraordinary.
He then gave me a paper from his holiness the patriarch, in which he says, "You will have received from us an answer, requesting that when we come to Alma, you will come up and see us. We expect your presence, and, if God please, we will provide you some proper situation, with an income that shall be sufficient for your sustenance. Delay not your coming, lest the present happy opportunity should pass by." Knowing, as I did, that many people supposed my object, in continuing with the English, to be gain, I did not delay fulfilling the request of his reverence, hoping to remove this suspicion, and to enjoy an opportunity of speaking the truth without being hired to do it.
So, about the 7th of January, I left Beyroot, with Hoory Nicolas, and arrived at Der Alma the same night. His holiness, the patriarch, was not there. On the next day, when he came, I met him, and saluted him in the road. In the evening he called me into his chamber, and began to ask me questions, that he might discover what I was; and I answered him telling him the whole truth, although this course was opposed to my personal convenience. At this he seemed surprised, for he must have perceived it was contrary to what he had been accustomed to see in me. Afterwards, when I declared to him, that I never had before been a believer, according to the true living faith, he was probably still more astonished. He then asked me if I believed as the Romish church believed. I again told him the truth, that I did not. He asked then what was my faith, and I answered to the following purport, "True and living faith must be divine, connected with hope, love and repentance, and that all these virtues are the gift of God &c.; that I believed the truth as God had inspired it; and that it would be but a lie, if I should say that I believed as the Romish church does, while in fact I do not. I must have proofs."
After some conversation like this, he told me that this doctrine of mine was heretical, and that as long as I remained in this state of opinion, he would suffer no one to have intercourse with me in buying and selling, &c. This prohibition of his brought to my mind the words in the Revelation, xiii, 17.[G] Then he gave me to understand, that if, after three days, I did not get back out of this state, I must no more enter the church. At other times, he wished me to swear by the eucharist and by the gospel, that my faith was like the faith of the Roman catholic church. He asked me if I was a Bible man; I replied, "I do not follow the opinions of the Bible men; but if you think me a Bible man on account of the opinions I have advanced, very well."
The sum of what I said was, that without evidence I could not believe what the Romish church believes. From that time, after three days, I did not enter the church for a space. Some time passed again, and the patriarch inquired of me my faith. I then explained to him what I believed respecting the unity and trinity of God, and that the Messiah was one person with two natures, and that the Holy Spirit proceeds from the Father and Son. Then arose a disputation about, who is the Vicar that Christ has appointed to explain his law. I answered in substance as I afterwards did in writing, that by reason, and learning, and prayer to God, with purity of motive, we may know, from the holy scriptures, every thing necessary to our salvation. This was the purport of my reply, which perhaps was not expressed with sufficient clearness, or perhaps I was not able to say it in the manner that was appropriate, for such a tumult and storm were excited in the company that they seemed to me to be intent on overcoming me by dint of vociferation, rather than by argument, and to drown my voice, rather than to understand my opinions.
When, after some days, came bishop Abdalla Blabul and Padre Bernardus of Gzir, the patriarch one day called me to them in his chamber, and asked me what I wished, whether money or office, or whatever it might be, promising to gratify me, speaking of his love to me and of his great interest in my welfare. These professions I know to be sincere, but they are according to the world, and not according to the Gospel. I assured him that I wanted nothing of the things he had mentioned; that I was submissive and obedient to him; and that if he thought of me, that I had taken money of the English, he was welcome to shut me up in my chamber as to a prison, and take from me every thing that I possessed; that I wished from them merely my necessary food and clothing, and that I would give them this assurance in writing. The bishop and priest then begged me, in presence of the patriarch, to say that my faith was like that of the Romish church. I replied, that I feared to tell a falsehood by saying a thing, while actually, in my reason, I did not believe it.
"But," said they, "the patriarch here will absolve you from the sin of the falsehood." I turned to the Patriarch and put the question whether he would so absolve me. He answered, that he would. I said, "What the law of nature itself condemns, it is out of the power of any man to make lawful." He then again asked me what I wished to do. I said, I wish to go and see the Armenian patriarch Gregory, and inquire of him what I ought to do. He consented, and requested me, when I had done this, to return to him, to which I agreed. I was accompanied by a priest from the station of the patriarch to the College of Ain Warka, where I found Hoory Joseph Shaheen, with whom I conversed a considerable time, and with great pleasure; for I found that for himself, he did not believe that the pope was infallible in matters of faith, that is to say, unless in concert with the congregated church. I then began to confess to him: but when I saw that he held steadfastly some opinions for no other reason than that the church so believed, and without bringing any proper evidence of the fact, viz. from councils or from the fathers, and burst out upon me with exceeding bitter words, saying, "Know that the church neither deceives, nor is deceived, and be quiet;" and when I wished him to instruct me according to the word of God, with the simple object of glorifying God and fulfilling his will, I saw that he was not disposed to support any opinion because it was according to the word of God, but because so thought the church; and I saw him also ready to retain these opinions, although I should bring the strongest evidences against them from the holy Scriptures. He told me that it was impossible for him to teach any thing contrary to the council of Trent. So I found I could not receive his system, because, though you should shew him that it was wrong, he would not give it up, lest with it he should be obliged to give up his office. I therefore told him, you are bound, i. e. shut up as between walls, by the doctrines of the pope and the council of Trent.
In conversation on the images, he would have proved their propriety from Baronius' church history. We found this author quoting the sacred scriptures to prove that our Saviour sent a picture of himself to the king of Abgar. I declared that it was false, in so far as he stated that the Gospel made any such statement, and on that account I could not believe the story. To this he gave me no answer. After this, as we were reading the book, and found a statement respecting the bishops collected in Constantinople, to the number of 313; that they decreed the abolition of the use of images, because it was idolatrous, and that in the clearest terms,—I asked him the question, "If an assembly composed of the bishops of the church were infallible, how is it that this council is said to have committed an error?"
About this time, I heard that a certain individual wished to converse with me on the subject of religion, which rejoiced me exceedingly, and I was impatient for an interview. He came on a Sabbath day to Ain Warka, for the study of the Arabic grammar, according to his custom, and we had a short conversation together on works unlawful on the Sabbath day, and other subjects. He then excused himself from further conversation for want of time; but promised that when we should meet again, he hoped to have a sufficient opportunity to dwell on these subjects at large. I continued at Ain Warka the whole week, reading with the rest at prayers and confessing to Hoory Joseph above mentioned; and on the next Lord's day, the Armenian priest aforesaid came again, and I fully expected to have time and opportunity to ascertain his opinions; but I was disappointed again; for he wished to have the dispute carried on in writing, and to have an assistant with him, with other conditions.
In these circumstances I failed of my object; but was on the whole more inclined than before to receive the doctrines of the Romish church; since the priest had promised to bring his evidence, on all points, from the word of God, that they (the papists) were walking in light and not in darkness.
At this time one informed me that his holiness, bishop Jacob, superior of the convent of Bzumar, wished to see me. And because Hoory Joseph, at first told me that this state in which I had fallen was a temptation of Satan, and at one time shewed me that it was usual for people, when they came to the age of manhood, to be tempted on the subject of their religion, and at another, assured me, that this was a state of delirium:—and again, because I had heard formerly that this bishop Jacob had himself been delirious, and that he was a man of information, I wished very much to see him; and on the same day I went to Hoory Joseph and declared to him plainly my opinions, and shewed him that the beast mentioned in the Revelation was a figure, as the lamb evidently was, and how dreadful must be the torments of those who worship the image of the beast. I then disclosed to him my intention of going up to the convent of Bzumar, where were the patriarch Gregory, bishop Jacob, and the Armenian priest already mentioned.
I set off the same day, and on my arrival saluted the patriarch, and on the same night reasoned on the subjects of faith, hope and love. It appeared that the patriarch's opinion was, that a man may be possessed of living faith, faith unto salvation, although he should feel nothing in his heart. I answered him with a quotation from St. Paul, "With the heart man believeth unto righteousness, and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation." But this did not convince him. He explained the heart to mean the will. It then appeared to me that he was not a true believer, and from that time forward I could not believe him, as I would believe a real Christian, but I wished to hear his worldly arguments. On the following day, I asked him how it can he said, that the pope was infallible if there were no proofs of the fact to be brought. I asked him if this pretension of the pope was that of an apostle, or a prophet? if an apostle, or a prophet, he could not be believed without miracles, and that we christians were not to believe any one, though he were to bring down fire from Heaven.[H] His replies to me were weak; and after considerable conversation on what is the church of Christ, on the ignorance that is pardonable, &c. he began to prove that if the pope is not infallible, then there is no religion, no gospel, and even no God. But I observed all his proofs so weak, that I could not be convinced, and I fell into deep perplexity as to what I should do. For sometimes I greatly endeavoured to submit my judgment to his rules and opinions, and made these efforts until my very head would ache. The next day I asked him what was that great city, ruling over the kings of the earth, mentioned in the Rev. xvii, 18? After he had brought his book of commentaries, he answered that it was Rome, which is also called spiritual Babylon, or Babel, and after wishing me to yield to his opinion or that of the book, he said nothing more. From this time I was with the patriarch every day for three or four hours, and his best advice to me was, to pray to St. Antony of Padua, together with one repetition of the Lord's prayer, and one of Hail Mary, &c. every day for three days. When I was thus in doubt from the weakness of their proofs, one of the monks said to me, "If you wish to know good tobacco, ask the patriarch." I hoped that this priest would explain to me those doctrines of the Romish church, which I could not believe; so I went into his chamber and questioned him very particularly on all points. He expressed his wish that we might discuss together all the points one by one, but on condition that the patriarch Joseph should appoint him to do so. He told me he had in his possession a book refuting the opinions of Luther and Calvin. I begged permission to read it; but he refused, telling me that the doctrines of the church all remained unrefuted. He wished me to go down to the patriarch Joseph on this business. So after a stay of four days from my arrival, I departed for Ain Warka according to my promise to Hoory Joseph.
Here I found one of my friends of whom I had heard that he had been very much astonished at my connexion with the Bible men. After I had seen him, and had conversed with him a little on some points, he would no longer hear me, fearing among other things lest he should be crazed. When we touched on the subject of the great city above mentioned, he told me that he had seen a book of commentaries on the Revelation, which made the city clearly to be Rome. At this I wondered greatly, since the meaning was so clear that not even the teachers of the Romish church herself could deny it. I then finished my confession to Hoory Joseph Shaheen, and about sunset the same day, went down to the patriarch to the convent Alma. He requested me again to write a paper stating that my faith was according to the faith of the Romish church. From this I excused myself, begging that such a thing might not be required of me, for the council of Trent had added nothing to the rule of faith, which was established by that of Nice, which begins, "I believe in one God," &c. A short space after, I gave him my advice, with modest arguments, and mild suggestions, on his duty to cause the gospel to be preached in the church among the Maronite people; and offered him the opinion that this should be done by the priests in the vulgar language, every Sabbath day, for the space of one or two hours; and if this should appear too burthensome to the people, to take off from them some of the feast days. After this, I remained silent in my chamber near to his own; and as there came to me a few of the deacons of the patriarch, and others, I read to them at their request in the New Testament printed in Rome. But in a little time after, I entered my room, and found in it none of all the books that had been there, neither New Testament nor any other, and I knew that the patriarch had given the order for this purpose, for he reproved me for reading the gospel to them, but he could accuse me of no false or erroneous explanations, or that I taught them any thing heretical.
One day after this, he called me to his presence and began to threaten me in a most unusual manner. I said, "What do you wish of me, your reverence? What have I done, and what would you have me do? What is my sin, except that I conversed with some individuals, shewing them the errors of the church of Rome?" Then he requested me again, to say, that I believed as did that church, and said, grasping me firmly by the chin, "see how I will take you if you do not repent." I begged him to appoint some one to shew me the truth, by way of discussion, but he would not, and continued expressing his own sentiment, that we are bound to hold fast to the church, even to such a length, that if she should even reject the gospel, we should reject it too.
And here I wish to say a word to every reader that regards and loves the truth; how does such doctrine appear to you? and how could I believe in all which the Romish church holds, without knowing all of it? and how could I say, without a lie, that I believe, when I do not believe?
When I saw the patriarch breaking out with an exceeding loud and unusual voice, I was afraid that I should be found among "the fearful," (Rev. xxi. 8.) and rose to depart. When I reached the door, I turned and said to him, "I will hold fast the religion of Jesus Christ, and I am ready for the sake of it to shed my blood; and though you should all become infidels, yet will not I;" and so left the room.
One of my friends told me, that he had suggested to the patriarch the grand reason why I did not believe in the pope, which was, that among other doctrines of his, he taught, that he could not commit an error, and that now, though a pope should see any one of his predecessors had erred, he could not say this, for fear that he also should appear to be an unbeliever. This friend also told me, that the patriarch wondered how I should pretend that I held to the Christian religion, and still converse in such abusive terms against it; and I also wondered, that after he saw this, he should not be willing so much as to ask me, in mildness, and self-possession, and forbearance, for what reasons I was unwilling to receive the doctrines of the pope, or to say I believed as he did; but he would not consent that the above mentioned Armenian priest should hold a discussion with me, and more than this, laid every person, and even his own brother, under excommunication, if he should presume to dispute or converse with me on the subject of religion.
Under this prohibition from conversation, and this bereavement of books, from what quarter could I get the necessary evidence to believe in their opinion?
Another cause I had of wonder, which was, that not one of all with whom I conversed, after he saw me to be heretical and declining from the truth, thought proper to advise me to use the only means of becoming strong in the faith, viz. prayer to God the Most High, and searching his Holy Word, which a child may understand. I wondered, too, that they should ridicule me, and report me abroad as one mad and after all this, be so fearful to engage in a dispute with the madman, lest he should vanquish them in argument, or spoil their understandings, or turn them away from the truth.
After some time came the bishop of Beyroot. I gave him the usual salutation, and was greatly rejoiced to see him, as I knew the excellency of his understanding, and his quickness of apprehension, and hoped that, after some discussion between us, he would explain the truth, and that he would rest on clear evidence to support his views. But in this case also, I was disappointed; for one day, when I asked him a question, and during the whole short conversation which followed, whenever I began to bring evidence against him, he was angry, and finally drove me from my chamber in a fury, and that with no other cause, as he pretended, than that he did not wish to converse with a heretic.
Some time after this, Hoory Joseph Shaheen came down to the convent of Alma, and I endeavoured to get him to unite with me in persuading the patriarch to send out among the people preachers of the gospel, or that there should be preaching in the churches as before mentioned. But he would not co-operate with me in this, and I was again disappointed.
Then, when the patriarch and the bishop of Beyroot wished to dispute with me, I expressed the hope that the discussion might be in meekness, and without anger. It was concluded that the discussion should be in writing, that no one afterwards should be able to alter what he had once said. They then commenced by asking me questions; the first question was, in amount, this, "Has the Messiah given us a new law?" At first, I did not grant that he had, strictly speaking, given us a new law, and quoted the words of John, that "the law was given by Moses, but grace and truth came by Jesus Christ;" but when I afterwards saw that by "a new law," they meant merely the gospel, or the New Testament, I answered in the affirmative. They then asked me if there was not to be found in this new law some obscurities. I answered, "Yes." They then asked me, Suppose any difference of sentiment should arise between the teachers of Christianity, how are we to distinguish the truth from the error? I answered thus;—"We have no other means of arriving at the truth, than searching the word of God, with learning, and reason, and inquiry of learned spiritual teachers, with purity of motive, and with disinterestedness of inclination. If the obscurities of the word of God cannot be understood by these means, our ignorance is excusable, and will not prevent our salvation. If the passages, which still remain obscure, concern faith, it is sufficient for a man to say, I believe according as the truth is in itself before God, or I believe in the thing as God inspired it to the writer. And if the obscurity respects our practice, after making use of the means above mentioned, if that branch of our practice be forbidden, or under a doubt, desist from it, but if it is not forbidden, do it, and Blessed is he that condemneth not himself in the thing which he alloweth."
After I had given them this answer, they brought no evidence to prove any error in it, and moreover afterwards never put to me any question to writing.
Once, as I was walking with the bishop of Beyroot, he began to tell me how much they all felt for me; and how unwilling they should be to put me in chains to die a lingering death; and that were it not for the sympathy and their love towards me, there were people who had conversed with them, who were ready to take my life. Some further conversation passed, and I began to introduce the subject of religion, and to ask how we could believe in the pope that he was infallible. He quoted for proof the words of our Saviour, Thou art Peter, &c. I asked him if it was proper to suppose that all things bestowed on Peter, were also given to the pope? If so, why does not the pope speak with tongues; and why is he not secure from the evil effects of poison, &c.? He answered, that these last things were not necessary. "But how do you prove it necessary," said I, "that the pope should not err? Is it not sufficient if any one has doubts, to ask his teacher who is not infallible? if you say yes, then the opinion of the fallible man will answer. But if you say no, and that we must go to the pope, what must become of the man who dies before the answer of the pope can reach him?"
He then resorted to another mode of proof, saying, "Is it not desirable that the pope should be infallible?" I assured him I wished he might be so. "Well, is not God able to render him so?" "Yes, He is able to do all things." He wished to infer his point from these two premises. But I said, "your reasoning with regard to the pope, may be applied to all the bishops of the church; for it is desirable that they should all be infallible, and God is able to make them so." He said, "No, for the bishops feeling less their need of the pope, would not look to him, or submit to him as their head, and then there would be divisions and contentions in the church." But why, said I, did not divisions and contentions arise among the apostles? Were they not all infallible as well as Peter? He would not say they were infallible. I told him, that was an opinion that could not be believed, that the pope was infallible, and the apostles not; for it was well known to all, that the Holy Spirit descended upon the apostles in a peculiar manner. I asked him again, how it could be made to appear that divisions would be produced if all bishops were infallible, for if they were all of one opinion, as they of course would be, their union must be the more perfect. We conversed farther at some length, when he concluded by saying, "You are possessed of a devil."
The next day, as the patriarch and the bishop of Beyroot were seated under a tree without the convent, I went out to them, and said, "Your holiness sent to me to come hither for employment, and I came, and have remained here a considerable time. What do you wish me to do for you, for I cannot remain here in idleness?" He said, "What do you wish to do?" If your holiness pleases, that I teach in the school of Ain Warka, I will do that. "No, I cannot have you go to Ain Warka, to corrupt the minds of those who are studying science, and to contradict my opinions." But I will instruct in grammar. "No, the youths of the college are now attending to moral science." Well, I only beg you will let me know what I am to do, and if you have no employment for me, I wish to return home. The bishop here broke in upon the conversation, saying, I will not suffer you to go back among my flock to deceive them, and turn them away to heresy. Will you then debar me, said I, from my home? If so, let me know where I shall go, what I shall do? The bishop then said to the patriarch, "Indeed I will not suffer this man to go abroad among my people, for he is even attempting to make heretics of us also." Yes replied the patriarch, it will not do after this, to afford him a residence in any part of the land. The bishop then turned to me, in the bitterest anger and rage, reviling me and saying, "If you go among my people again, I will send and take your life, though it be in the bosom of your own house." I said, "Well, what would you have me to do, and what will you do with me? If you wish to kill me, or shut me up in prison, or give me up to the government, or whatever it may be, I wish to know it." "You must wait here till spring or summer," said the patriarch, "and then we shall see how you are." I answered him in the words of that christian who was given by his judge ten days to deliberate whether he would worship an image: "Consider the time already past, and do what you please."
I asked the bishop his reasons for wishing to kill me. What evil had I done? He was filled with high and bitter indignation, saying, "What, miscreant! Shall we let you go forth to corrupt my flock for me? Is not what has passed enough?" I rose and said to them, "God at least is with me," and left them. The patriarch sent after me his nephew, requesting me, in soothing words to return, and saying that he would do what I wished.
But when I contemplated the hardness of heart manifested by the bishop, I could not restrain myself from reproving him, hoping that he would grow mild. I said, therefore, "Our Lord Jesus Christ said, out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh, and that Satan, who was in his heart, wished to kill me, for Satan was a murderer from the beginning." I told him, moreover, that he was not a true disciple of Christ. And when I had left them a second time, the patriarch again sent his nephew to enquire of me what I wished; whether it was money, or what else, promising that he would answer my enquiries.
I returned and told him, that I had a request to make of one thing only, and that I hoped he would answer me, not as to a little child, who would ask a childish thing. He asked me what it was. I said I have to ask of you the favour to send from your priests two faithful men to preach the gospel through the country, and I am ready, if necessary, to sell all that I possess to give to them as part of their wages. He promised me it should be done. But I had reason to expect that he would receive such a request as from the mouth of one out of his reason. Now there was at the convent a man called Hoory Gabriel, who was said to be insane, and was known to all his acquaintance as a man that never would say a word on the subject of religion, and he was a scribe of the patriarch, and from the time of my arrival until that day, had never asked me a single question about my faith, or opinions, nor had given me the least word of advice about any of my errors. The same night, as this priest was passing the evening in company with the patriarch, bishop, and other individuals, as if they had been conversing on my idiocy in making the request of to-day, the patriarch sent for me to come and sit with them. I came. The patriarch then asked this priest and the others present, if two proper men could be found to go and preach the gospel. They then answered one to another, such an one, and such an one, would be the fittest persons, some mentioning one and some another, looking at me in the mean time laughing, to see what I would say.
I smiled in a pleasant manner at all this, and when one asked me, why I laughed? I said to the patriarch, "Have you not perfect confidence in the integrity of the priest Gabriel?" He said, "Yes." I then said, pray let this priest then examine me for the space of a few days, and if he does not conclude that I am a heretic, I will for one, take upon myself this duty of preaching. This remark put an immediate end to the conversation.
The third day, when the bishop wished to mock me before the patriarch and a shekh of the country, I answered his questions according to his own manner; but in a little time he began to revile me, and rebuke me for blasphemy against the eucharist, against the virgin Mary and the pictures, and that because I had said before one of his deacons, that were it not for fear of the patriarch, I would tear all the pictures to pieces and burn them. I gave him answer to every particular by itself, and when he found that he could produce against me no accusation, he increased in wrath. I then said, if this is your pleasure, I will say no more. I told him that I had said, that pictures were not Gods; that such was my opinion always; and that I wished to tell all the common people so, that they might understand it. But to this he would not consent. He then began to accuse me of saying of the eucharist, "Let them smell the scent of it, and know that it is but bread and wine still." I told him that if he would give me leave to speak, or if he wished to hear my views, I would speak; "but how is it that you bring against me accusations, and do not suffer me to make my defence?" Here again he was not willing that I should speak, but the patriarch said to me, "Speak." I then observed, that St. Ephraim says, "Come, eat the fire of the bread, and drink the spirit of the wine;" and began to say from this, that our eating the body of Christ was not natural, but spiritual. Then again he fell into a rage against me. I said to him, "It is written, be ye angry and sin not. I told you before, that I would keep silence and not speak without your consent, and whatever you wish, tell me that I may act or refrain accordingly." At this the patriarch smiled. But the bishop fell into a passion still more violent, against the patriarch as well as myself, and rose and went away. I also left the room. In the evening, when were collected together the patriarch and bishop and all the monks, with priest Nicholas, whom they were about to ordain bishop on the morrow, the patriarch began to ask me questions respecting my faith. When I saw that their object was neither to benefit me, nor receive benefit, I gave them answers calculated to continue the conversation in a trifling strain, saying, "My faith is the faith of Peter, and the faith of Peter is my faith. I believe all that God has given by inspiration to the one only holy catholic church." He asked me, What is the church? I answered, "The church is the whole company of those who believe in the Messiah and his law, on all the face of the earth." But where is the place of the church? "The place of the church is the whole world, it is made up of every nation and people." "What," said he "the English among the rest?" "Yes, of the English also." Afterwards, when he continued to question me, and I saw that he had no other object than to try me, I assured him, this is my faith, and to this faith will I hold, whether it is worth any thing in your estimation or not. I then asked him if he was willing to hold a discussion on the subject; but he would not permit it in any shape. He afterwards requested me to tell my faith again without fear and without concealment. I referred them to the priest that was about to be ordained, saying, that I had conversed with him on all points particularly, and that he was able to make answer for me. The priest then bore testimony on the spot, that I had said before him that I believed the pope to be infallible, while I never said this to him at any time. Afterward, when I was in his company privately, I inquired how he could bear such testimony as he had done. He confessed in the fullest terms, that he knew it was a falsehood, but that he said what he did, that they might cease talking with me. The same night I had resolved on quitting them; so at about midnight I left the convent, committing myself to the protection of God, who never deserts them who put their trust in him, and arrived at Beyroot, on the morning of Thursday, March 2, 1826.
Here then I remain at present, not that I may take my views from the English, or from the Bible men, nor that I may receive my religion from them. No, by no means; for I hold to the word of God. This is beyond all danger of error. In this I believe; in this is my faith; and according to it I desire to regulate my life, and enjoy all my consolations. By this I wish to show what I believe and not to confer with flesh and blood, that I may not run now nor hereafter in vain; for I know and am persuaded, that the true religion is not according to the teaching of men, but according to the inspiration of God: not according to the custom of education, but according to the truth, which is made manifest by the word of God. I therefore say to myself now, as I did in the convent with the patriarch, where I wrote thus:
"Far from me be all the commandments of men. Nothing is to come into comparison with the teaching of Jesus by reading the New Testament. If our hearts are not transformed, there is the greatest danger that we die in our sins. If any thing in the doctrine of Jesus seems burdensome, let us pray that he may make it light; and if there is any thing that we do not understand, let us pray that he would instruct us and reveal the obscurity to all who truly believe in Jesus. There is nothing more delightful to the soul than he. O taste and see that the Lord is good! Blessed are all that put their trust in him! Cast thy burthen on the Lord and he will sustain thee. Sweet is the sorrow produced by his word; for it gives us an aversion to all the consolations of time. Let us therefore seek refuge in God. Alas for thee, O thou that trustest to the doctrines of men, especially if they give rest to your conscience, for that rest is false and deceitful, proceeding from the thoughts of men, and preventing you from attaining that true rest, of which the Apostles speak, saying, We do rest from our labours. Take heed lest there be in any of you an evil heart of unbelief in departing from the living God. Read the word and it shall teach you all things necessary to your salvation. If you say you do not understand it, behold the promise of St. James, If any may lack wisdom, let him ask of God, who giveth to all men liberally and upbraideth not, and it shall be given him. The divine word is a most precious treasure, from which all wise men are enriched. Drink from the fountain itself. Again, I say, vain is the philosophy of men; for it recommends to us doctrines newly invented, and prevents our increase in virtue, rather than promotes it. Cast it far from you."
This is what I wrote some time since, and I would revolve these thoughts in my mind at all times. The object in all that I have done, or attempted, or written, in this late occurrence, is, that I may act as a disciple and servant of Christ. I could not, therefore, receive any advice, which should direct me to hide my religion under a bushel. I cannot regulate myself by any rules contrary to those of Christ; for I believe that all who follow his word in truth, are the good grain, and that all those who add to his word, are the tares sown by the enemy, which shall soon be gathered in bundles and cast into the fire unquenchable. And I beg every member of my sect, i. e. of the Maronite church, who loves truth, if he sees me in an error to point it out to me, that I may leave it, and cleave to the truth. But I must request those who would rectify my views, not to do as did a priest at Beyroot, who after a considerable discussion, denied the inspiration of the New Testament. Men like him I do not wish to attempt to point out my errors; for such men, it is evident, need rather to be preached to, than to preach; and to be guided, rather than to guide. But if any understanding man will take the word of God and prove to me from it any doctrine whatever, I will respect him and honour him with all pleasure. But if a doctrine cannot be established thus, it is not only opposed to the doctrines of Christ, but to the views of the early christians, the fathers of the church; such as St. Ephraim and others. Such doctrines I cannot confess to be correct, although it should cost me the shedding of my blood. Be it known, that I am not seeking money, nor office; nor do I fear any thing from contempt, nor from the cross, nor from the persecution of men, nor from their insults, nor their evil accusations, so far as they are false. For I am ready for the sake of Christ to die daily, to be accounted as a sheep for the slaughter, for he, in that he suffered being tempted, is able to succour those that are tempted. I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that shall be revealed in us. I believe that Jesus is our High Priest for ever and hath an unchangeable priesthood, wherefore he is able to save them to the uttermost that come unto God by him, for he is the one Mediator between God and man, and he ever liveth to make intercession with the Father for us; and he is the propitiation for our sins, and to him be glory with the Father and his Holy Spirit of life for ever and ever—Amen.
I would only add, if there is any one, whoever he may be, that will shew me to be under a mistake, and that there is no salvation for me unless I submit to the pope, or at least shew me that it is lawful to do so, I am ready to give up all my peculiar views and submit in the Lord. But without evidence that my views are thus mistaken, I cannot give them up, and yield a blind obedience, until it shall be not only told that I am mad, but until I shall be so in fact, and all my understanding leaves me. Not until men shall have burned not only the Bibles printed by the English, but all the Bibles of the world. But these two things, understanding and the Bible, I pray God to preserve both to me and to all the followers of Christ, and that he will preserve and save all you, my friends, in the Lord.
ASAAD SHIDIAK.
Interview with several of his Relatives.
6. Among those who came to see Asaad to-day, were three of his brothers and an uncle. Mansoor, the oldest of the brothers, we had never before seen. He is a furious bigot, and perfectly ignorant and regardless of the first principles of religion. The second, Tannoos, or Antony, has lived among us as a teacher, and has good native and acquired talents; but, though he might be a protestant if he were left at liberty, he thinks it altogether preposterous to attempt to quarrel with bishops and patriarchs on the subject of religion.
These two brothers, and the uncle, (the last worse than the first,) came and conversed together with Asaad in his chamber a considerable time. Hearing them very earnest, I took the liberty also to go in. They continued their rebukes and arguments, (especially the uncle,) in so harsh and unfeeling a manner, that it made me tremble to hear them. They contradicted Asaad, scoffed at and threatened him, calling him possessed, mad, under the power of Satan, and so on. Asaad consented to go home and leave the English, which was the great point they wished to gain, provided they would get an assurance from the patriarch in writing, to say, on the faith of a christian, that he would not molest him.
"But," said they, "then you must hold your tongue, and not broach your new opinions among the people."
"What," replied Asaad, "must I go and live like a dumb man? No, that I will never do. My religion binds me not to do it. I must love my neighbour as myself."
"Why do you not go," said they, "to the Druses, and the Moslems, and preach the gospel to them? You answer, because there is danger. So there is danger in the present case; this is not a land of liberty, therefore be silent."
Asaad.—"Secure me but the free exercise of my conscience, and I will go with you. My religion is my all, and I must be free in it."
They.—"We can give you no such security. Nobody dares go to the patriarch with such a request. You cannot be permitted to publish your notions abroad among the people."
"Then," said Asaad, "there is no more to be said;"—rising, and with clasped hands walking the room;—"Religion unshackled—Religion unshackled, is my doctrine."
They rose and left the room in an angry despair. Mansoor returned, and wished to speak a word with Asaad at the door. In a moment, Asaad returned. "Do you know what Mansoor has told me?" said he. "His last words were, 'Even if the patriarch and the emir should do nothing; if they make no attempts to take your life; be assured, we ourselves will do the work: so take heed to your self accordingly.'"
Asaad was much affected by the interview. As soon as he found himself at liberty, he stepped up into the loft where he sleeps, and threw himself on his couch in prayer.
While in this attitude his next younger brother, Galed, knocked at the door. I called to Asaad to inform him of the fact; but he gave me no answer. I then invited Galed to another room, where Asaad soon joined us with a full and heavy heart. The two brothers saluted each other with embarrassment. Asaad evidently wished to be alone, and the brother, after a few mild, unmeaning inquiries, left him.
Begins to converse more pointedly with the People.
7. I yesterday advised Asaad to direct his conversations with the people, as much as possible to their hearts, and say little or nothing on the corruption of their church. He objected to the counsel. I referred him to similar advice he gave me some months ago. "Ah," said he, "I thought so then, but I now see that you cannot stir a step, but you meet some of their corruptions." However, he to-day made the experiment, and held an hour's conversation with two visiters on the subject of regeneration. They both thought themselves renewed, but took too little interest in the subject to confine their attention to it. "You see," said Asaad, after they had gone, "how little they feel on such a subject. It is painful to talk with such men. I would rather see them contradict, and dispute, and get angry, or any thing, than to appear so dead."
Interview with a younger Brother.
Asaad's brother Galed came again to-day, and discovered more feeling than yesterday on the subject of his brother's leaving the English. He said he had brought an insupportable shame upon the family. Asaad insisted, that such shame was no argument whatever for his leaving us; that all the disciples of Christ were to expect it as a thing of course. Galed assured him, that nobody would think of molesting him, if he were at Hadet. I asked Galed if his brother Mansoor did not threaten yesterday to kill him. He turned away, colored, and muttered something that I did not understand; but the whole was a full acknowledgment of the fact.
Asaad said, "I cannot confide in you."
"But," said Galed, "if any one were disposed to take your life, could they not do it as well here, as at home?"
I answered, "no; that the emir Beshir himself could not enter my house without my permission, and that if the relatives of Asaad did not cease from their threats, I should feel myself bound to shut them out of it."
After a long conversation, at the end of which he found Asaad as inflexible as ever, he rose abruptly, and was going out without a compliment, when Asaad started up, and asked, "Well, what do you conclude to do? Do you really intend to send some assassin to take my life in my room?" The youth, without deigning to look at him, closed the door in sullen grief, and departed.
Asaad turning to me, said, "I cannot please these people. Whatever I say, they are sure to be angry. Soft words, or hard words, it makes no difference to them. They come as if I were under their kingly authority. They lay hold of my cloak, and say, 'Give me this.' If I say, 'I will not give it,' they are angry; and if I reason with them with all the mildness of which I am capable, and say, 'Cannot you be accommodated elsewhere? Can you not wait upon me in a few days?' &c. they are equally angry."
Correspondence with his family.
8. A messenger called this morning with the following note.
"To our brother Asaad Esh Shidiak: May God bless you.—We beg you to come home to-night, and not wait till Sunday. We have pledged our mother that you shall come. If you fail to do so, you will trouble us all. Your brother,
GALED."
To this letter, Asaad sat down, and instantly wrote the following reply:
"To our much honoured and very dear brother Galed: God preserve him.—Your note has reached us, in which you speak of our coming home to-night, and say, that if we do not come, we trouble you all.
"Now if we were in some distant land, your longing after us in this manner might be very proper; but we are near you, and you have been here, and seen us in all health, and we have seen you. Then quiet our mother, that we, through the bounty of God, are in perfect health, and that we have great peace in the Lord Jesus Christ, peace above all that the world can afford, and abundant joy in the Holy Ghost above all earthly joy. But as to our coming up this evening, we do not find it convenient, not even though we had the strongest desire to see our mother and you.
"I beg you all to love God, and to serve him in our Lord Jesus Christ. This is of all things the most important; for if we love God, if he but renew our hearts by the holy Ghost, we shall enjoy each other's society for ever and ever.
"And now we are prevented from coming to you, and you know we are not void of all desire to see you, but the hindrances to which we have alluded, are, we think, a sufficient apology. We beg you to accept our excuse, and to apologize for us to our mother, and we pray God to pour out his grace richly on you all, and lengthen your days.
"Your brother, ASAAD.
"P. S. Tell our mother not to think so much of these earthly things but rather of God our Saviour."
Is visited by his Mother.
This letter had been gone scarcely time sufficient to reach Hadet, when the mother herself was announced at the door. We welcomed her with all cordiality, and treated her with all the respect and attention we could. But all we could do or say did not alter her resolution to get her son away, if in her power. She besought him by the honour he owed her, by the love he professed for her, by his regard for the reputation of her family, for religion itself, and for his own personal safety, that he would immediately accompany her home; and when she found him inflexible, she declared she would never stir out of the house unless he went with her.
To all this Asaad replied, "To what purpose would it be, that I should go home? You wish me to go, you say, that people may be convinced that I am not mad. But you, who come hither, and see, and converse with me, say, after all, that I am mad. How can it be expected that I should convince others that I am not mad, when my own mother will not believe it. Or do you think that if I once get out among you, the air of Hadet will change my opinions, or induce me to be silent? All these are vain expectations. I see no object to be gained. If I should go to Hadet, and be constantly disputing with the people, and telling them, that you are all going astray; that you are worshipping idols instead of the living God; that I could wish to tear down every picture in your churches; that the bread and wine of the Lord's Supper are not Jesus Christ; that I believe the pope to be the beast in the revelation,[I] whose business is to deceive the people and ruin their souls;—by all this, I should injure your feelings, enrage the people, excite the opposition of the emirs, and bishops, and patriarchs, and then return here just in the state I am in now."
The youngest brother, Phares, who accompanied his mother, conversed freely and in good temper, and listened with attention to all Asaad's arguments, by which he endeavoured to justify his views and determinations. But no argument or evidence could convince the disconsolate mother. Asaad had repeated the name of Christ, and the word of God so often, that she, at last, in a fit of impatience exclaimed, "Away, with Christ, and the word of God; what have we to do with them!" and when we pointed out to Asaad some text of Scripture, which we thought applicable in any case, she would endeavour to close the book, or catch it from him, as if it taught paganism, or witchcraft. During her stay we dined, and as Asaad took the meat upon his plate, and ate it without a scruple, in this season of Lent, it was remarked with what a gaze of wonder she regarded him. She seemed to say in her heart, "All is over—my son is lost!"
After some hours of troublesome expostulation and entreaty, during which Asaad once said he could bear it no longer, and rose, and shook my hand to go, it was finally settled that the mother should go home without him, but that to save the family from the insupportable shame, which threatened it, Asaad should give her a paper, stating, in effect, that he was not a follower of the English. When the paper was finished, "Now," said Asaad, "go to your home in peace;" and walked away; but suddenly recollecting himself, he called his brother back, and said, "Phares, I wish you fully to understand, that I love you, and I have one request to make of you, which is, that you will take the New Testament, and read it attentively."—"Give me a New Testament," said Phares, quickly. We gave him the book, and he went his way, evidently affected and softened by the interview.
9. The shekh before mentioned communicated to Asaad, through the medium of a priest, the offer of his daughter in marriage, on condition he should leave the English.
10. Set apart a day of fasting and prayer on Asaad's account. He was observed not to be in a happy temper. Towards evening he spoke of going home. I hoped he would finish writing the statement we had requested of him, "for," said I, "if you go home I shall not see you again for months." "No," said he, "perhaps not for years." His manner was very peculiar. I knew not what was the matter, till, in the evening, after a long conversation on the evidences of inspiration, he said, "I have been in deep darkness to-day. My heart has been full of blasphemy, such as I have scarcely ever known. I have even doubted the existence of God. But now I am relieved, and I would just say, I shall not go home to-morrow, as I hinted."
This temptation seems to have arisen chiefly from a discrepancy in the scriptures, which I had shewed him, and which I knew not how to reconcile. He begged that, for the present, I would by no means shew him another such.
Suspects himself to have been poisoned.
11. One of the neighbours brought Shidiak a letter, cautioning him, if he went to the shekh's house, not to smoke or drink with him.
12. Word came to Asaad, that the shekh was with the family below, and would be glad to see him. Asaad went down, but in a few minutes came up, pale and trembling, and said he was exceedingly dizzy and faint. He had just taken coffee below, attended with suspicious circumstances, and begged to know if he might not be poisoned. We opened a medical book we had, and explained to him, as rapidly as possible, the symptoms of a poisoned person. "Oh! these are my feelings," said he, and fell upon his knees before his seat in silent prayer. We immediately gave him an emetic, which operated well, and before night he was relieved of every alarming symptom. The youth who gave the coffee, being sent for, gave good evidence of having had no bad intentions; and notwithstanding many suspicious circumstances, we did not think the evidence of an attempt at poison sufficiently strong, to prosecute any public inquiry into the matter.
16. A youth from Der el Kamer called to see Asaad. He remarked, that he once saw a priest at his village tear in pieces five of these books of ours, but he could not tell for what reasons. He had, apparently, never seen the ten commandments before, and was very much surprised to find image-worship so expressly condemned in them. A letter was received by Asaad from the patriarch, written in very plausible terms.
Visits his Relatives at Hadet.
17. Four of the relatives of Asaad came down, and succeeded in persuading him to accompany them home. He said he could not believe, after all that has been said, that they would do him violence, and he strongly expected that his visit to Hadet would do good. A majority of us opposed his going with all we could say; but he thinks he knows the people here better than we do. He left us toward evening, expecting to be absent only a few days.
Their violence, and the consequent proceedings of Phares Shidiak.
24. Phares Shidiak came to my house to day, and wished to speak with me in private.
"Yesterday morning," said he, "as I was in my room reading the New Testament, my brother Mansoor entered, drew a sword he had, and gave me a blow upon the neck. I continued with the book in my hand, until one snatched it from me. Mansoor afterwards drew up his musket, threatening to shoot me; but my mother interfered to prevent him. My brother Tannoos hearing a bustle, came in with a cane, and began cudgelling me, without stopping to inquire at all into the merits of the case, calling out, 'Will you leave off your heresy, and go to church like other people, or not?' Mansoor not finding Asaad present, as he seemed to have expected, went to Asaad's chest which stood near me, seized all the books he had received of you, Hebrew, Syriac, Italian, and Arabic, tore them, one by one, in pieces, and strewed them on the floor.
"In the course of the day, I came down near where the soldiers of the emir are encamped, and passed the night in company with my brother Galeb. This morning he returned, with a line from me to Asaad, and I came off to Beyroot, with the full determination never to go home again. And now I will either go to some place in this country where I can enjoy my liberty or I will take ship, and leave the country altogether."
As he wished my advice, I counselled him neither to go from the country, nor from his home, but to return, and at least make a further trial of doing good to his relatives, and bearing their persecutions. He, however, continued inflexible.
In the space of a few hours, Galeb came in search of Phares, with a letter from Asaad, of which the following is a copy.
Asaad's letter to his brother Phares.
"To my beloved brother Phares; the Lord Most High preserve him. Your departure caused me great grief. First, because you were impatient when trial and persecution came upon you. It is a thing we are regularly to expect, that if we hope in God in this world, we shall give universal offence. But we have another city, for which we hope. Do not lose your courage, for you have not yet resisted unto blood, striving against sin. Remember, we cannot share in the glory of Christ, if we share not also in his sufferings. Therefore, rejoice whenever you are tried; rejoice, and never be sad; for our faith is sure.
"Secondly, I was grieved because you gave me no information where you were going, and what you intended to do. Now, it is not becoming, that we should do any thing rashly, that is, till we have prayed to God for direction. Come home, then, and let us set apart a season of fasting and prayer to God, and do what is most agreeable to him. Perhaps it is best to let our works preach in silence, in these evil days.
"You must know, that if you fail to come home, you will give us great pain, and this, you know, would be inconsistent with love. Jesus says, 'By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.' You well know how much joy and consolation it would give us to see you; do not then deny us this pleasure, but come at all events. If you do not come, it may be an injury both to yourself and me. I wish to see you, if it be only to say to you two words, and then act your pleasure; for not every word can be said with paper and pen. Farewell.
"Your brother and companion in tribulation,
ASAAD."
Galeb took me aside, and begged me to urge his brother to go home. I said I had already advised him to do so, but that I could not force him to go—that if he found he could not enjoy liberty of conscience, and the privilege of reading the word of God, in Hadet, he was welcome to stay with me as long as he pleased. "You are a man," said Galeb, "that speaks the truth and acts uprightly, but Asaad and Phares are not like you; they talk very improper things." Among these things, he mentioned a report to which Asaad had given circulation, respecting the patriarch, to which I was obliged to reply, that instead of taking it for granted to be a false report, he ought to believe it to be true, and that such a report was not abroad respecting the patriarch alone, but respecting a majority of patriarchs and bishops of the whole land.
After some further conversation on the wickedness of treating brothers, as they had done Phares and Asaad, we went to Phares, and endeavoured to persuade him to go home with his brother. But it was all in vain. "If I leave this house," said he, "instead of going to Hadet, I will go in the opposite direction." The brother returned without him.
Conversation of Phares with the Bishop of Beyroot.
After Galeb had gone, we put a great many questions to Phares, and he communicated some interesting particulars. Among others was the following:
"The day that Asaad and myself left you, (the 17th,) the bishop of Beyroot was at the next house, and I went to salute him.
"He said to me, 'I understand you have become English, too. You reason on the subject of religion.'
"But," said I, "is every one English, if he reasons on that subject?"
Bishop.—"But you read in the Bibles of the English."
Phares.—"Yes, and from whom is the Bible? is it from the English, or from God?"
B.—"But it is printed by the English."
P.—"Well, is it altered in any place?"
B.—"See, now you have begun again to argue on the subject of religion. I tell you, young man, cease this heretical habit, or you are excommunicated."
Phares informed us of three or four Bibles and New Testaments, that we had given at different times to individuals in Hadet, which had lately been destroyed by order of the bishop. This news, together with a discovery we yesterday made in the neighbouring house, of two covers of the New Testament, whose contents had long ago been torn out, shews us anew, if new evidence were wanting, that if the Gospel is ever introduced again in its power and purity into this country, it will be with a desperate struggle.
Two brothers of Phares, Mansoor and Galeb, came to converse with him anew. We saw them seated together on the ground, at a little distance from the house, but afterwards saw them no more. It is singular that Phares should have left without coming either to take his cloak, or bid us farewell.[J]
28. Having heard nothing particular directly from Asaad since he left, especially since the affair of the books, I yesterday sent him a line, and to-day received the following reply:
Letter from Asaad to Mr. Bird.
"Dear Sir,—After expressing imperfectly the love I bear you, and the desire I have to see you in all health, I have to say, that in due time your letter came to hand, and I read and understood it. You ask respecting our health. I answer, I am in a state of anxiety, but not so great as some days ago.
"On Thursday last, having come home from a visit to the emir Sulman, I found the remnants of the Holy Scriptures, torn in pieces, as there is reason to believe, by order of the bishop. When I was told, that my brother Mansoor had done this mischief, I returned to the emir, and informed him of the affair. He sent to call Mansoor, while I returned again to our house. I now learned, that my brother Phares had gone off. After searching for him some time, I went down to the inn in quest of him, but he was not to be found. As I was on my way returning from the inn, where I had gone in search of my brother, I prayed to God, that he would take every thing from me, if necessary, only let faith and love towards him remain in my heart.
"As I proceeded on, a man came up, and gave me information that all the consuls of Beyroot were slain, and that you also were slain with them. The report came from a man, who said he had deposited goods with you for safety. In order to be the more sure, I asked the man if it were really true, and he again assured me, that it was. Ask me not the state of my feelings at that moment.
"On reaching home, I heard this terrible news confirmed; at the same time looking out, and seeing the heap of ashes near the house, all that remained of the 11 copies of the holy scriptures which my brothers had destroyed, I burst into tears, and committed all my concerns into the hands of God, saying, 'Blessed be his holy name: the Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away;'—and so I prayed on, with tears and groanings, which I cannot describe.
"I afterwards heard, that Phares was probably in the neighbourhood, and set off to search after him by night, but found him not. When I heard the news of your death confirmed, I sent off a messenger, that, wherever Phares might be found, he might return; and when I received his letter, saying that he had gone to your house, I could not yet believe that the report respecting you was false.
"But when the truth on this subject began to appear, then I heard by a person who came to the yesterday evening, that the patriarch and the emir had made an agreement to kill me, and that they had sent men to lie in wait for that purpose. I was afterwards told, by another person, that some of the servants of the emir were appointed to accomplish this end.
"Here I am, then, in a sort of imprisonment, enemies within, and enemies without.
"One of my brothers, the other day, advised me to surrender my self entirely to the mercy of the bishop, whereupon I wrote the bishop a letter, (of which I send you the enclosed copy,) and gave it to my brother Tannoos, begging him to carry it to the bishop, and bring me his reply. Tannoos read the letter, and without saying a word, threw it down in contempt. I then gave it to my uncle with the same request, but as yet I have got no reply.[K]
"All my concerns I commit into the hands of God, who created me. Through the blood of our Lord Jesus Christ, I hope that all my distresses will be for the best.
"I accept with pleasure all your kind wishes, and send you many salutations in the Lord, and pray for you length of days.
"Yours, &c. ASAAD."
"March 27, 1826."
His relatives deliver him up to the Patriarch.
31. Information is received, that Asaad has been taken away against his will, to the patriarch.
April 4. Phares Shidiak arrived here in the evening direct from Der Alma, and said he had accompanied Asaad to that convent a week ago, that Asaad was still there, and that the patriarch, having in the morning set off for Cannobeen, would send down for Assad after a few days. He then handed me the following line from Asaad.
"If you can find a vessel setting off for Malta, in the course of four or five days, send me word; if not, pray for your brother.
ASAAD."
We were disposed to send off a messenger this very evening, but Phares said it would not be necessary.
Had some serious conversation with Phares, in which I exhorted him to continue reading the New Testament, and take particular notice of the general spirit of it; and then to judge, if all this deceit, confining, beating, and threatening to kill, was consistent with that spirit. We observed, that we supposed the patriarch and the bishop were well pleased with all the violence that Mansoor had used in this affair. "Yes," said Phares, "priest Hanna Stambodi, at Ain Warka, told me yesterday, that none of us had any religion, except Mansoor."
In a subsequent part of his journal, Mr. Bird records the following particulars respecting Asaad, during his last visit to Hadet, and when about to be violently removed from thence. They were received from Phares.
A neighbouring emir being sick, one day, Asaad carried him a paper of medicine, on the outside of which he had written how it was to be taken. While Asaad stood without, a servant took in this medicine, and gave it to the prince, saying, "This is from Asaad Esh Shidiak, and here he has written the directions on the paper." The prince, who is not remarkable for mildness, and perhaps was not conscious that Asaad overheard him, spoke out angrily, "A fig for the paper and writing; 'tis the medicine I want." "Your lordship is in the right," replied Asaad, "the truth is with you. The medicine is the thing; the paper that holds it, is nothing. So we ought to say of the gospel, the great medicine for the soul. 'Tis the pure gospel we want, and not the church that holds it."
After Mansoor, in his catholic zeal, had torn up and burned all his Bibles and Testaments, Asaad could not remain without the scriptures, but sent and obtained a copy from the little church, which he daily read, marking the most striking and important passages.
When his relatives, to the number of twenty or more, had assembled, and Asaad perceived they were come to take him to the patriarch by force, he began to expostulate with Tannoos, and besought him to desist from a step so inconsistent with fraternal love. He besought in vain. Tannoos turned away from him with a cold indifference. Affected with his hardness, Asaad went aside, and wept and prayed aloud.
The evening before he was taken away, he said to those who had assembled, "If I had not read the gospel, I should have been surprised at this new movement of yours. But now it is just what I might have expected. In this blessed book, I am told, the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and a man's foes shall be they of his own household. Here you see it is just so. You have come together to fulfil this prophecy of the gospel. What have I done against you? What is my crime? Allowing that I do take the Bible as my only and sufficient guide to heaven, what sin is there in this?" During the evening, he laid himself down to sleep, as he was to set off early in the morning. But he was often interrupted; for, whenever he caught a word of false doctrine from the lips of those who continued their conversation, he would rise up, refute them, and again compose himself to rest. One of his uncles, speaking of his going to the patriarch, said in a great rage, "If you don't go off with us peaceably, we will take your life." Asaad replied, "Softly, softly, my dear uncle, don't be hasty. Blessed are the meek."
Phares wrote a letter this evening to Asaad, in a hand that had been agreed on between them, saying, that if he would come to Beyroot, he need not fear, and that it might be a matter for further consideration whether he should leave the country.
5. The letter of Phares was sent off by a moslem, who returned at evening, saying that when he arrived at the convent, he was accosted by two or three men, inquiring his business, telling him he was a Greek, and had letters from the English. They then seized him, and took the letter by force, and, had he not shewn them that he was a moslem, would have probably sent him to the emir of the district for further examination. They then asked him some questions about the English, and assured him that after eight days Asaad would no longer be a living man. Thus were our hopes of a second deliverance of this sufferer of persecution, for the present, blasted. After all the threats, which have been thrown out without being put in execution, we rather hope, that this last will prove like the rest; yet we cannot tell how far their hatred of the truth may, with the divine forbearance, carry them. We leave all with him, in whose hands our life and breath are, and whose are all our ways, with the humble hope, that light may yet arise out of darkness, and that much glory may be added to his name, from this evident work of Satan.
6. Sent word, in a blind hand, on a torn scrap of paper, to Phares respecting the fate of our message to his brother. He returns answer that he is coming to Beyroot to-morrow.
7. Phares came, according to his notice of yesterday, saying, that if the patriarch should get his letter to Asaad, there would be danger in his staying at Hadet. He should be glad to go to Malta, or almost any other place out of the Maronite influence, lest his brothers should seize him, and deliver him up to the fury of the patriarch, as they had done his brother Asaad. Mansoor, the eldest and most violent of them, when he heard, yesterday, that a letter had arrived for Phares from Beyroot, breathed out threatenings and slaughter, not only against Phares, but against the innocent messenger himself.
8. Wrote to ——, a friendly Maronite bishop, to give me whatever information he might be able to procure respecting Shidiak.
May 10. A messenger whom we sent to Cannobeen, returned with the report that he was denied the privilege of seeing Asaad, under pretence that he was going through a course of confession, during which the rule is, that the person so confessing, shall pass his time, for a number of days, alone, and see no company.
14. We were, to-day, credibly informed, that Shidiak is still firm in his adherence to the gospel, but that he was kept under rigid inspection, not being permitted to step out of his room without an attendant.
17. Phares Shidiak informed us to-day, that he had been told that his brother Asaad had been at the college of Ain Warka. He thought it might be true, as one object in delivering him up to the patriarch was, to give the people the general impression, that he had no longer any thing to do with the English. He had now been a sufficient time absent from us to give general currency to the report, that he was no longer with us, and now, perhaps, the patriarch had let him go free.
Asaad is cruelly treated.
27. The messenger, who went before to Cannobeen, had set out to go for us a second time, and this morning early returned with the following story:—Being met by a man near Batroon, whom he suspected to be from Cannobeen, he inquired him out, and found him to be a messenger sent by Asaad himself to his uncles and other connexions, to beg them to come and deliver him. Asaad saw the man, and gave him his commission from the window of the convent, without the knowledge of the patriarch, or the others in his service. This messenger said, that Asaad was in close confinement, in chains, and was daily beaten; and that the great cause of complaint against him was, that he refused to worship either the pictures, or the virgin Mary.
I had written a letter of mere salutation to Shidiak by my messenger, which letter he enclosed in one from himself, and sent it on by his brother, returning himself with the messenger from Asaad. This brother of his, he is much afraid, may be ill-treated by the patriarch.
28. J., the messenger, called, and said, that he himself should not go to Cannobeen, but twelve or fifteen of his other relatives would go and endeavour at least to save him from chains and stripes. J. had been to the emir Beshir the less, who lives at Hadet, begging him, (with a present) to save his brother, if it should prove that he had suffered by the suspicion or the resentment of the patriarch. The emir promised to interfere—"But why," said he, "should Asaad go and join the English? they are a people I do not love."
June 2. A youth of the neighbourhood said it was reported that Asaad was a complete maniac; that he rent his garments, raved, reviled, &c. and that he had been sent to the convent at Koshia, like other lunatics, for a miraculous cure. This news was brought by priest Bernardus, of Gzir, mentioned in Shidiak's statement.
3. The brother of J. about whom he was so solicitous, returned last evening in safety, with the following letter in Asaad's own hand writing.
"To our respected brother J. ——. After expressing my love to you, I have to say, that your letter by your brother ——, arrived in safety, and I have understood it. In it you and ——, inquire after my health. May the Lord pour out his grace upon you, and follow you with his blessings. As to me, I am at present in health, with regard to my body, but as to other circumstances, your brother will give you information. Love to cousin ——, your wife. Pray send me word respecting you every opportunity, and may the Lord lengthen your days. From your brother.
"ASAAD ESH SHIDIAK."
This letter is certainly genuine, and is a full proof of what nature the insanity is, under which he labours. It has greatly relieved the anxiety we felt from the report of yesterday.
From the verbal account, given by the lad who brought the letter, the following are selected as the most important particulars. He entered the convent on his arrival, and seeing nobody but the keeper of the prison-room, obtained leave to go in, and see Asaad alone. He found him sitting on the bare floor, with a heavy chain around his neck, and firmly fastened at the other end into the wall. His bed had been removed together with all his books and writing materials, and (what is considered here the extreme of privation,) he was left without a pipe.
The lad continued with him an hour or two, without being discovered by any one but the keeper. During the conversation, Asaad observed, that not long since he was sent to Koshia, as a man possessed of a devil, and that he escaped from that place and had arrived near Tripoli, when he was taken by a party of Maronites, and brought back to the patriarch. He had, since that time, been kept regularly at Cannobeen, subject occasionally to beating and insult, from such as might call in to see the heretic. We understood the man to say, that the patriarch even instructed the common people to spit in his face, and call him by odious names, in order to shame him into submission. Asaad gave his advice that we should either send some one with a horse, and get him away by stealth, or get the consul to interfere by writing to the pasha. The letter written by Asaad was done through the contrivance of his keeper for a small reward.
Attempts made to procure his release.
After hearing all this, we went directly to the consul to inform him of the case, and to urge him to an interference. He consented, that we should first procure some one to write a firm and consistent letter to the patriarch, demanding by what right he had taken a man from an English employer, and under English protection, and imprisoned him unheard, &c. intimating, that if the man was not soon given up, something more would be done.
Toward evening, J. came again to inquire what we had concluded on. When he found what step we had taken, he seemed much alarmed for his own safety, and begged us not to proceed, for he should be immediately suspected as the mediator of the affair, and should be in danger of being persecuted as such. He mentioned, as a justification of his fears, that the keeper overheard Asaad when he recommended that course to his brother, and that the keeper, when inquired of, would of course mention the fact to the patriarch. Instead of the measure we were about taking, he recommended to apply to the emir, through one of his relatives, who was our mutual friend, and to this we consented. It is, however, probable, that the object of J. is not so much to avoid danger, as to put his friend the emir in a way to get a small present.
5. J. has been to see the emir, in order to persuade him to intercede with his uncle, the emir Beshir, but the former was not at home, and therefore the latter was not consulted. J. then went to the emir M. but found him quite averse to do any thing, saying, that to liberate a man, who had become English, would never do. He next saw Mansoor, the brother, and asked him if he knew that Asaad was in close confinement. "Yes," answered he, "and he may end his days there, unless he can learn to behave himself better." One characteristic mark of a heathen is, that he is "without natural affection, implacable, unmerciful."
J. says, that his brother has told him in addition, that Asaad himself, on the whole, wished not to have the consul interfere, but that some one might, for the present, be sent every week or two, to see how he got along, and in the mean time, he hoped to make his own escape, for that only a few days before, he had loosed himself from his chains, and got out of the convent, but not understanding the path, he became afraid to proceed, and returned of his own accord.
6. Went again to confer with the consul with regard to Asaad. When we mentioned the fact, that Asaad was under a sort of oath of obedience to the patriarch, an agreement which all make who are educated from the funds of the Ain Warka college, he seemed to think differently of the case, because, though an oath to bind the conscience, as in this case, can never be binding, and is neither acknowledged by Turks or English, yet, in the opinion of all Maronites, it justifies what the patriarch has done. This English protection, they would say, is of no avail, since he was under a previous engagement to serve the patriarch. The consul thinks the case, if presented to the chief emir, would be rejected without consideration, on the ground, that it was ecclesiastical, and not civil; and if presented to the pasha, he would exact fines from many innocent convents, and other wise oppress them, without perhaps, after all, procuring the release of the prisoner. He would prefer some secret mode of effecting the object.
Priest Bernardus, of Gzir, already mentioned was on a visit to the family below, and sent up to beg the favour of a sight at Shidiak's statement. I at first refused, but on a second application, and being assured that the priest was a friend of Shidiak, I consented, and invited the man to come and take with me a cup of coffee, which he did. It will be observed, that this Bernardus was one of those, who wished Shidiak to say that his faith was like that of the Roman catholic church, although it should be a falsehood, saying that the patriarch would bestow on him a pardon for the lie. The priest acknowledged to the family below, that Shidiak's statement of that affair was correct.
14. Received a line from the friendly Maronite bishop, to whom I had written, (April 8,) who says that he has been assured, probably afresh, that Shidiak is in prison, and suffers beating.
15. The emir A. came and conversed a length of time on the case of Shidiak. I offered to reward him well for his trouble, if he would procure his release, which he has promised to attempt.
21. J. came to say, that he had never seen the emir A. who had endeavoured to persuade his uncle to write to the patriarch. The uncle, however, refused, but added, "You may write in my name, and say, that it is my pleasure, that Shidiak should be liberated." The messenger has, therefore, gone with such a letter.
22. This morning, came Tannoos Shidiak, accompanied by a young emir, saying, that they had knowledge of our attempt to liberate Asaad, through the medium of the emir A. "It will not do," said he, "you will not accomplish your object so." They both said, that the emir A. was a great liar, had a little mind, and little, if any, influence with his uncle. In short, they proposed a more excellent way, viz. that we should give them also a good reward to engage in this noble work of brotherly love.
24. The messenger from the emir A. arrived from Cannobeen, with the following letter from the patriarch, in answer to his own.
"After kissing the hands of your honourable excellency, &c. &c. With regard to your slave, Asaad Esh Shidiak, the state into which he is fallen, is not unknown to your excellency. His understanding is subverted. In some respects he is a demoniac, in others not. Every day his malady increases upon him, until I have been obliged to take severe measures with him, and put him under keepers, lest he should escape from here, and grow worse, and infuse his poison into others. Two days ago, he succeeded in getting away in the night, and obliged me to send men to bind him and bring him back; and after he was come, he showed signs of returning sanity, and begged to be forgiven. But he does not abide by his word, for he is very fickle; and the most probable opinion respecting him is, that he is possessed of the devil. However, as he was, to appearance, disposed to yield me obedience, I treated him kindly and humanely, and used every means to promote his permanent cure. This is what I have to communicate to your excellency, and the bearer will inform you further. Whatever your excellency commands, I obey, and the Lord lengthen your life.
JOSEPH, Patriarch of Antioch."
27. A youth from Ain Warka informed us, that he had seen a letter in Asaad's own hand-writing, saying, that he had yielded obedience to the patriarch, and professed again the faith of the Roman catholic church. This report, excited great joy, he says, at the college. We are rather pained by the news, because, if Asaad has done this, we are almost sure it has been done insincerely, and merely to escape the pains of his persecution. The same person says, that a relative of the patriarch at Cannobeen, has been in the habit of writing, every week or two, to the college, to give the news of what was done with Asaad from time to time, in which he spoke of his chains and stripes, and so on. He also observes, that many people have boldly questioned the right of the patriarch to proceed to such extremities with the members of his church, saying, they saw not, at this rate, which was chief governor of the mountains, the prince, or the patriarch.
July 1. One who seemed certain of delivering Shidiak, if he should set about it, went, with our recommendation to Tripoli, from which place he hopes to have a convenient communication with Cannobeen.
14. The youth who went to Tripoli to attempt something, came back unsuccessful.
17. Application has been made by Phares to the emir M., but he refused to do any thing for Asaad, alleging that it is an affair of religion, and belongs exclusively to the patriarch. Phares says, that notwithstanding the superstition and anger, which his mother exhibited when here, she has more than once said, that the English are better than the Maronites, for they take an interest in the fate of Asaad, while the Maronites all seem to care nothing about him, whether he is dead or alive, happy or wretched.
Phares, as well as others, says, that Tannoos is Asaad's enemy from jealousy. Asaad is younger than Tannoos, but has been much more noticed. This Tannoos could not bear, and has therefore been quite willing to see him disgraced and punished.
Phares observes, that Tannoos was quite as favourably disposed to protestant principles as Asaad, but the moment Asaad took the start of him, he fell back, and is a much firmer Maronite than ever. He seemed to be affected at the death of Mr. Fisk, but inferred from it, that God did not approve the efforts of the protestants in this country. The death of Mr. Dalton, also, his former pupil, probably confirmed this feeling.
Great difficulties in the way of Asaad's release.
18. Tannoos came to converse about his brother Asaad. He had just received a letter in Asaad's own hand-writing, saying, that he was reduced to a great extremity of distress, and perhaps had not long to live, and begging Tannoos to come up and see if nothing could be done to end or mitigate his sufferings. Tannoos declares that he would be very glad to get him away from Cannobeen, if he could be safe, but that in any other place in the dominions of the emir Beshir, he would be killed. He might be safe at the consul's, but with me, he would not be. "There are men in these mountains," said he, "that can kill and have killed patriarchs and emirs, and that in their own houses; and why could they not kill Asaad with you, if they chose? Is your house more secure than the convent of the patriarch, or the palace of the emir? A man in entering your house, would violate all law, but the English would not make war for the killing of a single man."
I observed, that an application would very possibly be made to the pasha, by the consul, if Asaad was not soon delivered up. "An application of that sort," replied T. "would be quite useless. The pasha would send the application to the emir, and do you not think the emir would arrange the affair as he pleased? He knows well this sort of dealing. He has known how to manage these mountains for forty years, and do you think he would be at a loss about such a trifle as this? For example, what would be more easy for the emir, if he chose to detain the man, than to say he had committed murder, and therefore could not be given up?" "But," said I, "such a charge must be established by competent witnesses, and under the consul's inspection." "True," replied he, "and where would be the difficulty in that? The emir would bring 500 witnesses to-morrow to establish any crime he was pleased to allege. And as to his fearing the pasha, though he holds his office under him, yet his power is even superior to the pasha's."——"The patriarch," continued Tannoos, "can do just what he chooses, in spite of the English. You have brought books here, and the patriarch has burned them in spite of you. He has issued to all denominations a proclamation full of lies against you, and what have you been able to do? You have indeed written a reply to the proclamation, and hold it up to the people, and say, 'Look how the patriarch lies about us;' but what does he care for all that." |
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